Ethan - Blog

October ended.

2011-11-09T10:23:00.007+08:00

Hey, sorry that i went missing for like a month? Hope you guys are doing fine. October , no doubt is my favorite month of the year. Been having this resolution going to every possible famous DJ events(the ones i like),since i am still very frustrated the fact that i got into house music far too late and the fact that i missed Deadmau5 in Malaysia, yada yada yada anyway. So, if you have been following my blog, i went to DashBerlin, this time is Laidback Luke. 21st of Oct, eve of his birthday and ah soon's -.-" Was kinda torn apart, which one should i go, hmmm.. :D It was held at Zouk KL, and thanks again for making it happen guys.

Laidback Luke!

Actually im very reluctant to post this. They call me Laidback Liew ever since -.-"

I actually slept only 2 hours and i managed to go to work. The hangover...oh my -.-" You can only imagine. Would like to take this opportunity to thank kianhan sueann and dennis for their hospitality. :)

4 days later.

Hansel's surprise birthday party arranged solely by his gf. Another one that i salute, it wasnt easy to get things done, especially obtaining a video of me wishing Hansel happy birthday. LOL.

Hansel.

A video of our coffee bean former member

Most probably confused with kianhan's msg

And we ended October with half of #BU at Overtime Mont Kiara. Originally organised by Lau, but he failed to attend due to sickness. So we drank without him. Oh! Leon and Lynette went back early because Alvin needed to go back early. Pictures were taken when we were having a rest from the drinking game.

Yes, Sean Hooi was there.

On a whole different note, i saw this picture were circulating around facebook. Thought that, it really summarized everything into a single picture. Chong Siew Mee, if you are reading, this picture is for you.

Sincerely,

Ethan.

Different point of view.

2011-10-03T12:35:00.013+08:00

Read this from bottom till top. =)

Ethan.

Sincerely,

Well, that is it for this year, hopefully next year's even better. By far the best birthday i had yet. Thanks for still being here checking up on me. Appreciate much. Those who just happen to be here, thanks for using 5 minutes on my blog.

Thanks for being a part of these activities. Thanks for coming all over from Melaka or Kuantan.

The gang who completed the run.

If you can focus or zoom in whatever way, it says Bieber.

Soo wai and I crossing the finish line. If Soo Wai did not make a mistake, our time was 2 hours and 24 minutes.

Is there such thing as too early to take pics? heh!

I retired early around 12 something, touched down lau's house,straight to the toilet. Lunch's out but not dinner. Hmmm so weird,not by right should be dinner be vomited out? whatever. Slept straight until few hours later, Sean came and woke us up. I thought i couldnt make it to the run, but somehow i felt fresh waking up(wait till 5 minutes later)..so i went toilet for awhile. Ok then the hangover feeling came -.- But hey, it's a marathon on my birthday, i wont let any hangover prevent me from going. around 5 something in the morning we're there at Sunway Pyramid.

That is why we shouldnt drink too much

Ah miu again. Thanks bro!

Some say unicorn doesnt exist. Hmm..

That's right, yours truly, officially 24.

Li Ann.

Basically rest anywhere i could,Li Ann tried to lift everything she could

Kok.

Lau offered comfort, but Lisa got none.

Nope,not even licked.

Nope, i was that close. Still no kisses

Li Ann's attempt to carry Hhl. His expression should be the best of October. Oh i was at the back "resting".

You might notice there is a number of pics like this,but no, i got zero kisses on my birthday,day before or even day before.

The girls.

Fat Dennis joined us for the 1st time. May many more to come.

Eekie and Lynette

My cousin.

Bromance

Ade and Foo

Notice top right corner of this picture. lol

Thanks for the cakes guys. Though i do not remember eating them but ..

"i'm ok. peace!"

Maybe a little water would help

Yet to be able to find the culprit ordering this monster. My ability to focus dropped drastically after that.

Notice when people are abit high,they tend to put their arms around ppl more often. :D

You got a problem? =/

Our routine BU roar. Honestly i had no idea what we were shouting ;)

this one was misleading because pics are not in sequence. Dah half KO.

The group.

I did mention about 3 days of activities right? Day two, 1st October 2011. Mont Kiara OverTime. We intended it to be a light drinking/dinner session and to retire at most 12am. Who are we kidding, with alcohol involved, no such thing as 12am lol. Special thanks to Carmen, my cousin for coming <3 This venue meant something as i remember clearly, the night my ex broke up with me i was here drinking and my cousin told me she broke up too. Oh well, how things have changed? She and I both looked happier, at least from the outside. Maybe we learned to see things from a different point of view, it wasnt an easy lesson, more like we were forced to learn. I announced knocked out on this particular night.

Thanks for coming guys :)

Sleeping buddha? More like smiling.

The scarf and the handbag wasn't mine.

Someone actually was pinching my ass. -_______-"

Infernal affairs 6.

Clearly they got in the way of infernal affairs 6

we call ourselves brokeback walls.

the girls

Ignore my panda eyes.

Ah Miu

Special shoutout to Kian Han and Sue Ann who went back early,thanks for coming.

we were early

First of all,my apologies for not updating for so long. Finally i got a chance to, hey, it was my birthday last week! Weee! That wasnt a happy weeee , a sign of me getting a year older. And yet what have i achieved? Not much actually,but that i shall leave to next post. This is about my birthday, It all starts at 30th September 2011. The gang from Kuantan decided to have a clubbing session on Friday,since we couldnt do it on Saturday and Sunday night. Initial plan was to go Velvet, but it was canceled and we switched to G6 last minute, BU style lol. I was so busy on friday night,i almost was late for my own celebration, but hey all is good.

a very much #BU weekend updated

2011-09-05T09:53:00.005+08:00

Hey,it's been awhile since i dropped by. It's September, and I had an awesome weekend to welcome September.

Thursday 1/9/2011: Genting . People who supposed to close branch did not come things got into a mess when both colleagues not picking up phones, luckily Steven picked up and agreed to do so during his off day. To be honest, i could have just ignored everyone's calls, my work is until 7pm and that's it. But i thought i was at least my responsible to make sure it is closed properly. After all that worrying, we went for a roller coaster ride and a giant spinning swing -.-". How do i put it,hmmmm i was very nervous when it was our turn to play the roller coaster ride. It was

average-speed and average adrenaline rush, but since i have zero tolerance for height, everything turned scary.

Was busy calming myself,got no time to look at the camera.

Friday 2/9/2011: Changkat,KL.It was informed only yesterday that we were doing a surprise dinner for Jerry. It was a #BU event, of course we did it and we did it good. Though to be honest, Thai food is not my thing, but i gave it a try, i vowed to say yes to more things. It sucked nevertheless lol.. After that they decided to go Velvet for after party, like usual i gave it a rain check? they call it rain check right when you say "next time"? 1)Parents were in KL 2)working tomorrow and should not be unable to wake up and affect Saturday's plan.

Saturday was epic. Saturday 3/9/2011. There were few "flawed" moments including Leon actually was sick on that day >.< . Oh, Leon's girlfriend, Lynette(which i still prefer to put it as linet) she threw a surprise birthday party for Leon if you didnt know. This was planned almost a month ago, it was very hard for all of us to keep it as a secret away from Leon. That means no inviting Leon to bbm chat groups, no creating event in facebook, no talking anything about september or 3rd of september or bbq or whatever. Yes there were hiccups, such as"keep it for 3rd of september" a comment Jerry made to Chiew Heong's status , this one in particular is very funny i think, Soo Wai wanted to wish Jerry happy birthday on thursday past midnight, "Happy Birthday bro, see you tomorrow" , yeah that would ruined friday's surprise dinner. so I alerted Soo Wai, and he changed it to "Happy Birthday bro, see you Saturday". -_____-" Yeah,that would ruined saturday's plan as well. So he gave up and put it just "Happy Birthday bro". I would like to take this opportunity to salute fellow #BU members as they partied at Velvet and still able to wake up at designated time, Lau even woke up at around 10-11am. He came to my work station that morning and we chat while waiting for the arrival of the big four, Miu,Ah Soon, Becks and Nick. We had even a surprise attendee, whom all of us had not met since God knows when. Everyone left KL on time, Kok came and got me together to Soo Wai's place, Jerry and Li Ann already there. Thanks Jerry, for bringing us to Melaka. Also thankful that Soo Wai knows how to reach AFamosa, where we basically guessed the meet up place(there were more than one yellow building).

When night came, everyone dressed down 1)comfort purpose 2)afraid being thrown into the pool

So, Linet came with Leon at entrance of AFamosa, "8 minutes" she said. So i gathered everyone and and waited opposite the house as you can see below. Most of us were holding sprays(Yeah,Leon was covered entirely with those).That was the longest 8 minutes ever, because it was definitely took longer than 8 minutes to arrive and mainly because we couldnt wait to get the party started.

Due to the insufficient fund of #BU, we were reduced to presenting gifts in such forms as below. Such humiliation, we nominated Ah Soon :P

tired faces around

proper serious one

i would say inappropriate one =)

Happy birthday to Jerry, Lau and Leon! Some say a picture tells thousand words, but whoever made it to the party, can even tell more. What happened there stays there, good or bad.

Have a great September, whoever you are reading my post.

Ethan.

a very much #BU weekend

2011-09-05T09:53:00.004+08:00

Hey,it's been awhile since i dropped by. It's September, and I had an awesome weekend to welcome September.

average-speed and average adrenaline rush, but since i have zero tolerance for height, everything turned scary.

Was busy calming myself,got no time to look at the camera.

Saturday was epic. Saturday 3/9/2011. There were few "flawed" moments including Leon actually was sick on that day >.< . Oh, Leon's girlfriend, Lynette(which i still prefer to put it as linet) she threw a surprise birthday party for Leon if you didnt know. This was planned almost a month ago, it was very hard for all of us to keep it as a secret away from Leon. That means no inviting Leon to bbm chat groups, no creating event in facebook, no talking anything about september or 3rd of september or bbq or whatever. Yes there were hiccups, such as "keep it for 3rd of september" a comment Jerry made to Chiew Heong's status , this one in particular is very funny i think, Soo Wai wanted to wish Jerry happy birthday on thursday past midnight, "Happy Birthday bro, see you tomorrow" , yeah that would ruined friday's surprise dinner. so I alerted soo wai, and he changed it to "Happy Birthday bro, see you Saturday". -_____-" Yeah,that would ruined saturday's plan as well. So he gave up and put it just "Happy Birthday bro". I would like to take this opportunity to salute fellow #BU members as they partied at Velvet and still able to wake up at designated time, Lau even woke up at around 10-11am. He came to my work station that morning and we chat while waiting for the arrival of the big four, Miu,Ah Soon, Becks and Nick.

To be updated soon(would like to wait for more pictures).

day # 61

2011-08-18T21:44:00.004+08:00

the work is taking its toll on me. always come back not physically tired,mentally. Tired of staring and doing nothing. =/ yes you heard it right, im paid to sit and stare at on-going pretty girls shopping, and no i'm not working as a guard. Want to share with people who read this, hey! last weekend my 2nd sis came back from singapore and i told her that i went to church. She was excited and supportive; she brought me to Borders next to Fung Lye at Gardens (we were having family dinner there) in search for a good and easy to understand bible. To be honest, i was shocked that she was that enthusiastic but yet happy that that was almost the 1st time in my life that she actually support in something that i want to do/believe in.

Before i end this post, Jan gave me a small gift when i told her my story about my sis. I dont know if she got it before the story or after, but either way, thanks Jan!!

Sincerely,

Ethan.

61 days and i'm still not over you. Keeping my words at least for this one last time. 4 more months and i'll leave slowly.

Quickie

2011-08-06T10:54:00.003+08:00

It's August! Started my new job, hmm how should i put it, hmmm eye-betic yet mentally exhausting due to the boredom, inconsistent schedule and the list goes on. And yeah, i actually ended my July with Dash Berlin @ MOS, made possible by couple of #BU friends. It was awesome! I guess alcohol and shouting lyrics singing along they dont go well. LOL because i lost my voice for a good 2-3 days. Mainly because of the song, "Man on the Run". I knew at one point i was at my limit, so i stopped drinking. But the surprise of the night was, Kok K.O. that night. We all have our troubles, Kok was no exception, so who are we to judge eh? Guess it was a good night for everyone.

And that weekend,Sunday, i went to City Harvest KL. It was an experience where it is hard to be described with words. But if i must, with the help of others; I was "touched" by God or I found Him? Still in the progress of figuring out.

Regards,

Ethan.

ps; hope one day we are able to talk as friends.

Best weekend of my life so far

2011-07-25T09:44:00.007+08:00

*notice that there are still a few pics Sharm and Nick yet to upload/send to me, so..have to do with just these few.

23rd July. Woke up with goosebumps, omg it's SATURDAY, INCUBUS! 9am i was awake and sent Bruno to ss2 for grooming. Later, I went theCurve with Nicholas for a quick lunch, McD..He called it Maccas..i wonder if it was because Aussie ppl call it maccas. Anyway, so we

went to get Bruno after lunch. It was a joyful right, seeing Nick wrestled with Bruno hahahaa.

Despite of those laughter, i had to clean the car mainly because i did not want any trouble from my sis and also Sharm going to follow my car. So off we go to get Sharm nearby Bangsar LRT and yes a dude lived in Aussie for far too long and a guy who seldom drives, we got lost XD. Frustrated, Sharm came to bangsar lrt with a taxi lol. Then we rushed to Hilton@Kl Sentral for my additional 2 MTV World Stage tickets, yeah how cool was that eh?! Well, i first bought Pop Shuvit's album in order to obtain one ticket for WorldStage, then there was this contest on twitter by Pop Shuvit themselves, first 5 to tweet the album with the receipt,will ge

t additional 2 tickets, i was like, hmmm what the hell anything la. So after i got the tickets, we all were like alright! let's go Stadium Negara!

ME: Sharm, you know how to go rightttttttttt?

Sharm: I thought you knew

ME: -____________- great la a car full of ppl not knowing how to go.

So we decided to take a guess and head to kl anyway, but with nick using my phone's google maps(he kept on refreshing) and our luck, we managed to get there, with a proper parking of cos, a proper parking came with a price, rm10. I freaking bet it was rm5 in the morning. We went up, and to find ourselves a queue. And it was only like 5 something at that point. Concert starts at 8pm(?).

i really do think Incubus deserved a full crowd.

At one point we were so close to the stage, but once Incubus came out and opened with Megalomaniac, the crowd went wild, and i really mean wild. Basically stuck in mid air if you jump. Lol. It was all fun, local band was the opening act, didnt really give me a good impression. The vocalist has this look where he thought he was so damn awesome. Dude,actually you're not. Incubus setlist for the night was ok, not much different from 2004, but of cos this time they came promote for their album If Not Now, When? I still remember i was very frustrated why they did not close the night with "Drive" back at 2004, but this time around they

did play that song, only when we decided to get some water. Damn. We missed a good half of the song.

But it was all good. Put it this way, there wasn't a dull moment. During concert, 3 of us found out about something lol..someone smoked weed in there,that scent. The concert ended around 11ish and to avoid jam, we sat there while waiting for Sharm's sis to reach. The jam got worse, even in the parking itself we waited like 20 minutes just to get out. There's a price to pay as well in this sense. So my night didn't end there, no no. I sent Nick back to his place at Casa Tropicana, there is this place called MJ, great hang out place. We grabbed supper there with Kok and Soo Wai. Had a tower of beer as well. Yeah i know, since that sanctuary incident, i'm kinda sick of it already. I must tell you people who care, hey! improvement, i dont think things that i shouldn't anymore when i drink. So, yay! right? righttt? >.<

24thJuly. Woke up having a replenished throat but not entirely. Back was aching due to all the pushing,mosh pits and standing. Wondered if i can go through another concert of that nature; hesitation? HELL NO i told myself after that, i was very determined to make that weekend memorable,unforgettable even with my gold fish memories ; hence the pics and videos i have been asking them to upload, sorry , just to make sure! Bugged Sharm to go early, but her boss CBB, C Beng Beng. Who the fuck would name their kid Beng Beng, that's plain lazy or lack of innovation lol. Anyway, she can only be free at 4pm. So i had pizza near

by to kill time, alone. It has been a while since i had a meal outside alone. To my surprise, hey, it wasnt too bad. At least i do not need to wait the person to finish his/her meal or having the person to wait for me. Get to enjoy my music (was playing 30 seconds to mars and incubus). You see i was torn in between, still having Incubus hung over, but yet embracing myself with the awesomeness of 30SecondstoMars. I drove slowly after my meal, towards Summit, knowing she

most probably not ready cos it was only 3.30pm, so i went to some mamak to have a drink, yes, i was alone accompanied by some tamil songs. By the time she was ready i got her into my car, again yes you guessed it right, we both dont really have a clue how to go I-City. Awesome eh? Tried our luck again, then we realised we were at the wrong direction of federal highway, made a big U-turn and we reached there safely thank God! First i thought i was in luck, i was late but the parking attendee let us in, fee of *drumroll* yes RM10. But whatever,didnt care. So we went in but there was no parking. No fucking parking and there wasnt a way to to back in the parking place by the time we got out. And we ended up parked across the street. We had to roam around the area to find the counter, as we needed to register ourselves. Scared Sharm a little b

ecause she had no IC with her, nothing. -.-" Turns out too many people, they didnt bother to check. There was this

clause where ppl who attend needs to be at least 16 years old. Yeah right, i saw a lot of kids there ok.

This what they gave us when we registered, didnt understand at first why the fan.

Some camwhoring wouldnt hurt. There was actually a better version,but Sharm claimed that she deleted it. But i dont really buy her story.
Pop Shuvit was the opening act. I think i got too excited i threw my fan away, which later i realised it was one big mistake lol. Hey, they were playing Marabahaya at the point ok.
Yes ladies, Jared Leto of 30SecondstoMars

I wish i can show you pics of Neon Trees, they made me a fan. Was almost clueless who are they, until they sang Animals, ohhh this songggggg WOOOHHHH! Great performers i must say, and that chic playing drum..oh my..she can play as good if not better than most male drummers. The lighting during Neon Trees and 30SecondstoMars was great and there were fireworks! Still getting chills recalling those performances. To me the best part was when Jared "bid" farewell to the crowd and went in, crowd in x-zone at least was chanting the "wooooohhh wohhhhh" part in the song Kings and Queens, wonderful ; to indicate that we want MORE of 30SecondstoMars! And also, what was great about the performances, Jared Leto did "The Kill(Bury Me)" acoustic, he didnt really sing the song, why? The crowd was singing 90% of the song, what he sang was only the "necessary" parts.

What i learned about concerts after these two, the crowd is important. Not to stand next to crazy ones, not to stand next to boring ones. Boring ones can be found at the back usually, where they dont interact at all, crazy ones would be mosh pit idiots lol. In between boring and crazy would be ppl like us, jumping at the right time and sing along loudly. That's it for now, at least, cos it's 2am already. Sleepy and i'm not really recovered from fever. So i think i'm excused. =) Will upload more pics once i have them alright?

Regards,

Ethan.

ps. AWESOME-ST WEEKEND EVER! if only i attend Dash Berlin as well, that would be a perfect way to end July.

ouch!

2011-07-21T02:36:00.003+08:00

mcb hurts like bitch, watching 500days of summer. knnmcb pukimak. today is july 21, and i'm officially done whining,mourning,crying i can feel my 500days is coming to an end. Weekend of rock. maybe,just maybe, autumn is waiting. =) i am so excited for this weekend, i'll do something that is totally out of my nature. Sooooo random that; hey, you look thirsty. Can i buy you a drink? My name is Ethan by the way nice to meet you. Whatever! Ha!

Regards,

Ethan.

A walk to remember

2011-07-20T23:57:00.003+08:00

heh! today was an experiment day. i took a chance to walk to oneutama from my house,approximately 40minutes away. omg and to imagine i have to do it everyday from august. But my main purpose of this journey to give Jan a surprise. She was admitted into SDMC. Could have ajak Abelene along if she wasn't having finals.

I can't estimate my journey from oneutama to sunway because one thing and one thing only; bloody bus drivers like to talk among each other, taking their own sweet time. -________-" I can foresee i'll be late on the first day.

Sampai sana dy, couldnt call Jan to ask where exactly is her room,that would spoil the surprise, so i went and ask the receptionist.. that guy tot i main hentam put name only >.< Then while walking towards her block, saw her tweet say preparing for alot of pain, i thought i was late again. So gave in and called to check. I noticed the difference before and after dressing. She

spoke soooooooo softly that was the time i told myself, this only happened once in a blue moon LOL. Well, i also took the movie from her, 500 days of summer. Going to watch it right after i post this. Looking forward to autumn ^^. I noticed that most girls (my own experience 2 so far) they have this old soft toy with them, and conlanfirm is animal. My ex girlfriend's was a dog named Dumb Dog(dont ask why) and Jan's was a cat..garfield to be exact. THE IRONY LOL. Anyway.. yeah. Didnt manage to resist temptation, took a pic of her anyway and tagged 2 of the 3 top fav men of hers Leon and Kevin(if you dont know,3rd one is me) & abelene so that they know what's happening.

she looks exactly when she was 13 lol!

This visit brought back memories yo,but different hospital. Aih, past is the past. =) What's left is like i said, just memories.Ok dont kacau me watch 500 days of summer. AUTUMN IM COMINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!

Get well soon Jan!

Regards,

Ethan.

Confession on the Incubus weekend

2011-07-19T09:49:00.003+08:00

Lies, yeah i done them before. Person who i lied to,found out the truth and she was hurt. I was an ass for lying. Now that everything is over, there's nothing to salvage. The reason i kept blogging, is just because i want to. I was blogging way before i got to know you,not as frequent. This time around i might blog every now and then because i have the time, as soon as i start working at sunway, i bet posts count will drop drastically. Just bear with me alright =)

Some of my friends are too busy or some stalkers are too shy to ask and they want know a little what's going on with me, LOL. yeah so.

Reason i am not angry or upset anymore what was said about me, i see no point in retaliating. When is it going to end? i mean, yeah you have your own true version of our story and i have mine. Mine confirm is incomplete due to my memory, my apology. Or maybe,i chose to keep only memories together;of Melaka and Kuantan. Ways you used to make me stay longer in Melaka or the communication between you and my mom back in Kuantan.

You were way too good for me, i didnt know how to appreciate you. It was all my fault, what have been said and done. You have nothing to do with this fallout between us. I was in denial and it was too late for me by the time i woke up. So thank you for the memories,basically whatever i do from now on,it makes me think of you because you're awesome that way. Every sip of the coke, every chicken rice ball i eat,every bak kut teh i eat ...everything. So go ahead and move on happily with your new guy (eh hi! way to go man! u should appreciate more,do exactly opposite of me and you'll be great!) while i will slowly walk my own path. Eh wait you already did! My bad. So did i, walking for...quite sometime.

So long story cut short, everything was my fault,my loss. Got a weekend to look forward to. =D

Regards,

Ethan.

Still amazed me how our name can merge and sound like a real word lol. smeethan/smitten.

2011-07-18T11:49:00.003+08:00

Well, that was a fruitful session of replying a comment. Ahemm, Hi! Been busy working opening shift. Stoning each day to work, even worse when it is after work. Last Tuesday was fun, you know why?! Nicholas Tsau touched down from Aussie and came to play futsal with us. So, we finally became the "unstoppable". Well, the record told the whole story, 5 wins 0 lose. Those who dont understand football or futsal, it's hard to explain the excitement, having an "unbeatable" team hahahaha.

Heh. Like i told you guys, i have been working in Coffee Bean at the Curve. Enjoyable one month i must say, i'm thankful when you guys let me in when i needed a job. My final week at Curve would be this week, Friday is my last day. Yeah, if you guys hadnt know, i got another job in Sunway Pyramid =) I will be working towards my bigger goal, hopefully i'll be leaving 2nd half of next year. I pray for essential traits so that i can last till my goal is achieved, or anything that is better arranged by God.

Oh ya p.s. ; totally unrelated but, remember people do take your words seriously when you're upset or caught in the heat of moments. "Eh, but i thought people say ;caught in the moment geh words shouldnt be taken seriously." ... Errr but the same person who inserted this idea to me is going against what the person said to me? Get it get it? Double standard much? LOL!

Regards

Ethan

abit upset.

2011-07-13T23:59:00.003+08:00

seriously who you think you are? You misinterpreting the whole sms/blog entry into something you claimed on twitter? You made it sounded wrong and all i wanted wanted was my cds back that's all. There are two meaningful gifts in there, Shawn bought The Ataris for me and my #BU friends bought Green Day for my 16th/17th birthday. Please, don't misunderstood my msg and assumed it your way. Bluntly put, 1) what made you think that i want to see you after all these? I wished you well remember? 2) What is there to drama about even if you come with your new man?You have a happy life yay clap hands! Who doesnt know that? you basically trying to tell the whole world about it. I'm happy in my own definition, so please, do me a favor, even if it will kill you to see me and pass me the cds, you can just leave them there to my friends, i dont mind. Thank you. Emmm if you get to read this, great. if you dont, well take this as a post for me to clear the air. If this seems like not truthful, well then up to you. i dont care.

Regards,

Ethan.

cleaning up my closet

2011-07-12T10:20:00.002+08:00

Hui Wen once asked me, it is easier to assemble back a broken heart or to find an entire new one? Logically, it would be finding an entire new one. But when it comes to acting it, logic abandoned me or maybe the other way around, i tried assembling pieces of heart. FAILED! Actually have grown tired of being disappointed,being disappointed in myself of capable doing such thing,capable of letting temptations run my body and soul. I am coming out stronger!

Till the extend of coming to curve,knowing that i am here working, didnt even bother to drop by and at least have the courtesy to bring my cds and return them back to me. You may have the heart to ignore me,i don't.

The more i put the pieces together, the more i felt like i was being screwed over. Felt like i already lost you even before you fractured your leg. But whatever, i do not want to talk about it anymore. Entirely how i felt, i have no evidence or any intention to make a false claim. Hmm but then again his name does sound familiar.. -_______________-"

Ok done ranting.

Regards,

Ethan.

ps i seriously think i'm like my country, we both need help to fix ourselves,from the inside.

random

2011-07-11T13:12:00.002+08:00

October 17,2010. You came to my house, i cooked porridge for you. you couldnt wait to show your friends, you put the caption as "oi sam juk". :( Ha! i havent even cooked for my parents or sisters before. Still until today,i kena comment from my parents zzzzz.

It's almost been one month since i woke up, i live my days with a broken heart but i shall come out stronger, for i believe everything happened for a reason? i hope so.

Regards,

Ethan.

ps Would like to say thank you for those who walked for Bersih 2.0 rally. =) You made a difference.

man on the run.

2011-07-08T00:03:00.002+08:00

These days i listen to alot party songs,get myself into the beat,into something rather than nothing. At least my mind searches for the beat, the kick some might say, this, is always better than my mind is wandering of somewhere near you know who. Dreams, you guys know i have problem with those. I am now, prefer to stay awake until i fell asleep,if can i rather not. The feeling after waking up,realizing it was all a dream, it hurts like bitch. Yesterday was a dream about a call from her mom. I dont know how much torture i have to go through,because you know better, she has moved on,happily, why not me? Isnt it unfair? isnt it time for me to move on as well? No one told me life's fair, but to be this unfair, it's a bit too much. Words of mouth, you are slowly enjoying party life. Well, this song has good party vibe and more important,read the lyrics. So if you happen to read this, this song is for you.

Dash Berlin - Man on the Run.

You stole a kiss and stole my heart
made me a fool right from the start
It wouldn’t have been so bad except
this little plan, it fell apart

If I were you
I’d dare not speak
I’d run like hell
In hopes of seein’ tomorrow

It’s such a travesty
the way you say our love should be
yeah, such a tragedy
think you can just break my heart and leave me
well you better run
Oh, man on the run
playin’ for fun
wind me up
leave me undone

These lips are sealed, I’ll never speak
your name in loving memory
so don’t you try to make ammends
that’s what ya get for playin’ mean

If I were you
I’d dare not speak
I’d run like hell
In hopes of seein’ tomorrow

Ahhhh, break my heart and leave me
Man on the run

Regards,

Ethan.

You.

2011-07-06T12:57:00.002+08:00

You must stay out of my dreams. Thank you. Just a tweet about you,i was trying very hard not to think.

When two become one.

2011-07-04T00:43:00.005+08:00

02/07/2011

windows are opening again,which is good. Alliance Bank called, UOB called (which i dont know why the bank's HR didnt update others) and my friend/ex colleague/senior going to set me up for a solid chance at Ambank. I'm thankful to have these chances, nonetheless, my main goal is continue study/work at New Zealand. If Ambank is as solid as it claimed, i hope to earn as much $ as i can,so that i can afford to go there.

I just can't wait to leave, i have this friend, anonymous, broke up for a good 6-9months, still having random dreams about the ex. Given that i had 2 in space of 3 days, that's not a good sign. i do not want to end up like my friend. 6-9 torturing months, that is too much. My friend now has random emotional moments that i can totally relate to(not that i want to) but yeah i want them to go away. Each freaking coke i drink also will get me thinking. Sometimes i wish someone or myself, can slap me in the face(sounds like a job for someone famous with slaps) and shout move on! Shout to me that she already happily moved on,and you being miserable not helping.

I asked my friend to intro some girls to me(yeah,old school but it worked last time out so.. -__-" i just hope this time around i can use a more catchier phrase than liverpool's anthem), then she asked "Desperate ke?". I said "Desperate to move on".

Oh and also, yesterday, 03/07/2011 after work, i decided to surprise Janice with the surprise in a form of human being named Abelene :D

Though the journey to Subang full of idiots on road, but nonetheless, it was worthwhile since these two macam lama tak jumpa jeee. We went for dinner nearby cos i insisted not to go near the roundabout to ss15. But after a while, they "forced" me to drive there anyway. There was an indian man looked as if he just peed beside my car. -______- DEY,BANYAK LAGI KERETA,KENCING LA TEMPAT LAIN!

We went to buy Gong Cha and lepak at Jan's place. Night ended like that :P oh i reached home on the dot phewwwww avoided witch level 99's wrath. Thanks for the drink Jan & Abelene :P

Two days worth.

Regards,

Ethan.

Never had a dream come true

2011-07-01T12:54:00.002+08:00

Went thecuriousdreamer website to analyze my dream. Yeah,i'm a believer, at least i guess it can somehow to relate what is really going on with me inside my mind.I prefer not to talk about the dream =) you guess yourself what the website has analyzed.

cry

An alert that something needs attention (when a person or baby cries, they often need help or support)

A dream about an ex-boyfriend, ex-girlfriend, ex-husband, ex-wife, etc. can mean:

You have unfinished business with this person
You are fondly remembering something about the time you were with them and that you'd like to experience that feeling more in your current life—but most likely not with them

forehead

Thought or ability to think
Awareness of something, as in having something "at the front of your mind"
Intuition or knowledge
Connection with Spirit

bicycle riding

The way you're "running your life" right now, or the way you have been recently
Making progress—or a lack of progress (depending on what happens in the dream)—in real life
The degree of balance you are maintaining in your life

Ethan.

Update of me.

2011-06-28T09:53:00.004+08:00

Doors are closed,windows are shutting down. Stop pushing me to a dead end,give me a small junction at least. Just when you thought you have a debit card and your account book with you but no transport,you can at least check it via online the status of the account. And it says pls call customer service for assistance, guess what? My phone barred,hence the account thingy at the first place. Now walking to the nearest HLB, it's a challenge, my sense of directions over here in TTDI is just so so. And i can't leave my house yet, not until that idiot lamp guy comes over and fixes the lamp.

There are thoughts to go over to new zealand. Yes, this is sudden. I want to leave this sad place for good. There's basically nothing left for me over here. Even my family thinks i'm hopeless. Basically letting me to rot over here. Difference between my friend and i now, his family let him rot over there and here hahahahaha. I hope my friend can set me up so i can leave now as in, NOW. He's talking to couple agents as we speak. In fact, there was this colleague of mine also flew there and she's working there. Maybe i should go to her facebook and ask. I pray to God that everything goes well and i can afford to go over there at least. That would be the final monetary request i would ask from my dad. at the very least, i want to go singapore. Yes, in a way, some if not all, might think i am a coward running from all the troubles and sadness i have here. I dont see it that way, i see it as a window. Since doors are closed here, might as well give it a try, at least try to go. If my application is really successful, all the better. If not, ok i'll try another way.

Guys, those who care to come check on me, then yay! you're one of the first to know. keep it to yourself alright? Nothing is confirmed yet. Those who dont ah, mmm if things really happen, i'll let you know lo. =) Sorry if i'll be missing my own birthday marathon. Kind to think of it,damn i really would want to try if i can finish 16.8km. And you know, i think there's only1 or 2 that can make me stay if i were to go. Deep inside,even if she doesnt make me stay, at least i secretly hope that she'll talk to me and be friends again. why have this kind of ending? -.-" it's weird cause i do talk to all my ex,in fact im close to them. hahahaha.

That's all for now,there's a guy fixing the ceiling. Need to keep an eye on him.

Ethan.

sei lo if over there no internet i ma kenot update blog lo hor? -.-"

Funny.

2011-06-27T11:03:00.002+08:00

Justin Bieber and Rascal Flatts - That Should be Me

Everybody's laughing in my mind,
Rumors spreading 'bout this other guy,
Do you do what you did when you
did with me?
Does he love you the way I can?
Did you forget all the plans
that you made with me?
'cause baby I didn't!

That should be me,
Holdin' your hand,
That should be me
Makin' you laugh,
That should be me,
This is so sad,
That should be me,
That should be me,
That should be me,
Feelin' your kiss,
That should be me,
Buyin' you gifts,
This is so wrong,
I can't go on,
Till you believe that,
That should be me

Ouuuuuuu
ouuuuuuuu

That should be me,
Yeah,
You said you needed a little time
For my mistakes,
It's funny how you used that time
To have me replaced,
Did you think that I wouldn't see you out at the movies
Whatcha doin' to me,
You're takin' him where we used to go,
Now if you're tryin' to break my heart,
It's working 'cause you know that,...

Chorus:

That should be me,
Holdin' your hand,
That should be me,
Makin' you laugh,
That should be me,
This is so sad,
That should be me,
That should be me,
That should be me,
Feelin' your kiss,
That should be me ,

Buyin' you gifts,
This is so wrong,
I can't go on,
Till you believe that,
That should be me

I need to know should I fight
For our love for this long
It's getting harder to shield
This pain in my heart!!!

Chorus:
That should be me,
Holdin' your hand,
That should be me,
Makin' you laugh,
That should be me,
This is so sad,
That should be me,
That should be me,
That should be me,
Feelin' your kiss,
That should be me,
Buyin' you gifts,
This is so wrong,
I can't go on,
Till you believe that,
That should be me,
Holding your hand,
That should be me,
Oh i makin you laugh, oh Baby,
That should be me,
(that should be me givin you flowers)
That should be me,
Talking by hours,that should be me, that should be me,
that should be me

Never should've let you go,!
I never should've let you go,!
That should be me!! <3
Never should've let you go
That should be me!!<3

Suddenly it's like every songs also singing about me. kanasai!!!!!!!!!! URGH! I shall be stronger!

Sincerely,

Ethan.

Mixture feelings

2011-06-26T23:46:00.003+08:00

ha! decoy jek,getting everyone not to read my blog anymore. Yeah i know,hou dak han la me. Yesterday june 27, we went for dinner and drinking session. Well,couple of things made me not happy, but i think i choose to mention only some. first of all, the dinner consisted of 5 persons including myself. Well,we were planning before and we found out that a certain someone was with Jerry and Liann also at the Curve going for dinner. Someone that all 5 of us know, and we asked them why dont we join together? Well,people insisted not to. And when after dinner,oh why dont you come join us for a drinking session? Well, ppl bo steady dont want to come. I dont know why,i really put effort and get us all talking again, but hey, at least i tried. Yesterday night,at first we were outside of Sanctuary, just being polite and shy, we ordered only a pint for ourselves. As night went on dying and the music got louder, we decided to go in and enjoy the music. Before we know it,we ordered a tower, then another one @.@ had too much to drink. Dont judge please, it's been awhile since i drank, so.

Each sip down my throat reminds me of the pain. no,nothing is wrong with my throat, thank you God for that. Pain in the heart. Each drink reminded me of the things i did, so well,drank them all away. And hey, fun automatically came after that!! hehehehe. I am a proud fan of Bieber, so i danced proudly and passionately to his song. BABY BABY BABY AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. Oh yeah, Jerry and Liann came after the dinner. I was so_____(fill in the blank), we(me and kok wai,thank you for being as drunk as me) literally ran back to our table from toilet when party rock anthem was playing. That pretty summed up my night, ended up lying down everywhere and vomitting everywhere. Yes i admit i still not over

her and yes i am still very much in love with her. Fuh,it actually feels good admitting stuff ha! But time will heal, im sure.

Oh,beside of wanting to tell you guys that i used a good 16minutes just to find where my sis put chipsmore,i saw MC's status about clinging to memories. I commented,"it's fucking pointless". Well after some considerations,i decided to remove it, of cos one of the reasons also because she also commented there,but something totally unrelated to the status. Truth is i like memories, i think beautiful or not, they are a part of me. Hmmm, do you think i should ask her to masuk her blog? cos there are two post that about me that she blogged. most probably she'll ignore my request or deleted it already anyway. My point is, i see it is pointless if you cling to memories just to change things. aih,even blogging about her also i did more. What the hell, if she says i love her less than she loved me, i would definitely say bullshit man.Enough about her,people most

probably lovey dovey already and i should get my life back. Early release from 25 to life XD

Last but not least, we met back our old classmate at Sanctuary, Chin Soon, i dont know why but his face and voice reminds me alot of donald duck.Ok signing off.

Sincerely,

Ethan.

#6 and the last.

2011-06-24T08:46:00.002+08:00

Hey sup people who comes to read. Dont get too excited with the title, unfortunately or maybe for some people fortunately, #6 is the final day,and this blog either will go into hiatus or i'll delete it off. hmmm,most probably this stays,i'll use a new blog if i have to.

Why the sudden you might ask? I'm as clueless as well,i found out through a mutual friend. But since she can do things this way, i should at least respect it and let go, even she didn't bother to give me a call and say "hey,you should really move on now,i'm with him now". What if all my friends didnt bother to let me know, would i be stupidly and dumbly holding on a false hope? Dont get me wrong, maybe the "hope" wasn't there to begin with. I'm not judging,because i am too, a selfish person, dont you think she should have told me so i can move on too? I can confirmed she at least read the Belinda story,well she told her friends my story was "incomplete" or "twisted". So let me get this straight, so it is ok for her to move on but she doesnt want to let me know and let me move on as well? I still remember she once complained, "we didnt even have our closure yet,and you already doing things telling the world you're single and available,that's very disrespectful". I took the advice, to the world i might be single, but i wasn't available throughout this whole thing. If not i would have been with a subang girl(rebound or not,that's up to me). I thought hey, maybe i should wait it out, i mean for old time sake, 1 year plus is not a short period of time, that thought even when i was in the period of making grave mistakes. Well thank you for that, look how far that sentence brought me. I don't know about you guys, my opinion,she is as selfish as i am,as cold as i am because the only thing differentiate us now is the wheelchair. I could have spend alot of time living in regrets and pursuing for nothing. Why dont she just set me free?

My selfish ways or cold hearted decisions whatever you people want to call it, it was a mistake. I pleaded for forgiveness and i pleaded for a second chance. Granted, it would have taken time or it wouldn't have happened at all for me. My point is, all my doings these past 6 months were mistakes,and her actions which i personally think that are selfish and cold, those are not mistakes. She is thinking straight, so it is only natural to say those actions are her actual self. I guess this evens things out. I don't owe her anything, tears,begging, being treated coldly,being ignored, name it, I don't. Since she wants me to live my life with regrets, fine. I dont know why i am fine with that,but yeah. I guess i'm so used to let her have things her way.

Self forgiving is another way out. Bernard prayed for me, well i hope he doesnt mind, i changed the sentence in a way im praying.I hope i can seek forgiveness in God,i believe He knows from my bottom of my heart that i realized what i have done is wrong. I pray He will guide me so that i can able to let go and come out stronger and see more purposes in life. He knows i want to change for the better. I pray that He will give me strength for His words says "i can do all things through Christ who gives me strength". I surrender myself unto Him as He is much bigger than my mistakes. I pray all this in Jesus blessed name, Amen!(sorry if i say or type anything wrong here.i'm still new >.<)

Officially signing off,you have seen the last of Smeethan0225.

Sincerely,

Smeethan0225.

i love you baby.(sorry couldnt help it.)

#5

2011-06-23T09:18:00.005+08:00

nothing much to talk about because i dont think she even comes in and read and also the fact like i'm a broken disc player,repeating the same shit. maybe the first few she did, doubt she read #3 #4 and today's. Self forgiving is hard Ming(my manager) said. Some struggle their whole life some struggle only 1 day. Since it is almost impossible for her to even talk to me anymore, let alone forgiving me, i at least try to forgive myself.

Cibai robot bising like fuck. The one that spins around to clean the floor for you.

Yesterday was the 2nd day of me back in Coffee Bean. I already know,except for Ming and I, the guys all are womanizer. All 4 of them. I am still not that close to them to advise them not to be. Though i understood how was it like,i was their age once,but i guess i am not that kind of person anymore.I could have more than one "girlfriend", guess i was changed by her unconsciously. Well enough of that,because i guess you guys are tired of me talking too much about those. But just few more sentences because i got to hear a song while i'm making my drinks which brought a memory back. I bet you people listened to a song called Dear God by Avenged Sevenfold? I dont know if she remembers, i sang to her this song last time,she cried on the phone. Sigh,every single line of the lyrics hit the right spot.

A lonely road, crossed another cold state line
Miles away from those I love
Purpose hard to find
While I recall all the words you spoke to me
Can't help but wish that I was there
Back where I'd love to be, oh yeah

Dear God the only thing I ask of you
Is to hold her when I'm not around
When I'm much too far away
We all need that person who can be true to you
But I left her when I found her
And now I wish I'd stayed
'Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired
I'm missing you again, oh no
Once again

There's nothing here for me on this barren road
There's no one here while the city sleeps
And all the shops are closed
Can't help but think of the times I've had with you
Pictures and some memories will have to help me through, oh yeah

Dear God the only thing I ask of you is
To hold her when I'm not around,
When I'm much too far away
We all need that person who can be true to you
I left her when I found her
And now I wish I'd stayed
'Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired
I'm missing you again oh no
Once again

Some search, never finding a way
Before long, they waste away
I found you, something told me to stay
I gave in, to selfish ways
And how I miss someone to hold
When hope begins to fade...

A lonely road, crossed another cold state line
Miles away from those I love
Hope is hard to find

Dear God the only thing I ask of you is
To hold her when I'm not around,
When I'm much too far away
We all need the person who can be true to you
I left her when I found her
And now I wish I'd stayed
'Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired
I'm missing you again oh no
Once again

aih.so what i wrote all these here?Like a friend said, i wrote it here because i want to. There's nothing for me to hold onto to be honest, only memories and fucking pictures. so this was how she felt. i understood most if not all her feelings,and i can assure you,it's not at all pleasant. :( :( yeah dream on chee tat,like those pathetic pouts will bring you anywhere.

Chee Tat.

#4 day starts like this

2011-06-22T09:24:00.010+08:00

Yeah, i'm going to start with some pictures as i was looking through my phone.Yes,syok sendiri. Whatfuckingever.

I dont know about you,but i think we look so erm "pinang belah dua"

Our first official date together. Though it was only at the back of her house -.-"

One of the multiple pics i asked her to send to me whenever i want to see her.

Now you understand why i like to stare at you whenever you're eating or doing something?

With our without braces,i was serious about you looked pretty

Let me make silly jokes to make you laugh again.

ok la this pic looked forceful. what! very few ny pics we took together T___T

since the monkey's tail broke(sorry,my fault),i bought her this instead.She has the heart i has the hand. symbolizes that she has my heart.

sometimes she can be very insecure about her looks. she always dont believe when i say she looks good. you do,silly girl.

she likes white roses. it' almost as hard as finding purple roses.

each time i was so nervous,i nearly missed.

psst, actually she looked chubby here i dont know why lol.

this is one of the reason why i seldom take pics of us

i would rather spend time taking pics like these

You know after the snowflake incident i took a walk back where we first dated. Never thought it would be so different when you walk alone at that park.

you remember this "hut" right?

I bet you remember this seat.Time flew and the bush grew too,i bet you didnt know.

How different is this picture to the one with your hand locked in mine

I'm not sure if you remember this staircase. This was where i first kissed you.

i couldnt understand how she got the idea that i moved on early. Granted, i went for beer sessions and party(ies), let's be honest,a picture doesnt tell the whole story. If you guys have my facebook or twitter(my display picture now), oh i might seem to have the time of my miserable life. i drank like each glass(in an abnormal speed) like they can make me forget the fact that you broke up with me that night. Yeah, i deleted her off my facebook account, i deleted all the pictures of me and her in facebook,yeah i changed all my passwords and my twitter account name. i had a valid reason for that,i was tired of reading those status updates where she flaunting to everyone what i have done to her,everything but my good side.Those who borrowed my ipod to play angry birds would know,those who borrowed my ipod for housing loan calculator would know, how "over" i was towards you. My ipod touch still the same wallpaper,still the same screen saver,pictures folder untouched. Those who scrolled over my blackberry's picture folder would know.When you called,did i ignore your calls?When you texted me,didnt i reply?When you emailed,did i not read it? i do not have the heart to ignore you at all.I'm not saying that i dont deserve every inch of the treatment i'm getting,all i'm pleading to her is,dont throw this too soon.We both worked things out for a year plus and you threw in the towel already?

yeah who am i to question you when i myself backed out from you,i wronged you dearly. But did you not do the same thing to me?Each time things go south, you backed out from me,you breakup with me. Did i not come back to you each time? This time,i told you i needed a break. Is it wrong to have a break from all things you promised me but not fulfilled? Need a help refreshing mind? your temper, nvm that,i understand your temper and i can tolerate. You said you wouldnt say breakup that word anymore,you would work things out. yeah you came back say you said it out of the heat of moment and you said there wont be next time, but you are very used to me sayang you so much that i wouldnt care if you dont keep your words. you know very well that wasnt the first time happening. Tables are turned,and now,why cant you sayang me one time so much that you trust me,i'll keep my words.That mistake will never happen again.Why cant you take my stupid decision makings are just brainless and was only caught in the heat of moment?

Did you not say we can be back together right after i had "this separation"/"break" be it 6 months or a year? granted, maybe i shouldn't have that stupid dumb break at all. i shouldnt watch too much tv and learn ppl use the word "break". break my backside meh tiu.This is one of the reasons why i did not delete everything, i believed we still stand a chance. Ya maybe i was stupid to think so, maybe i was stubborn to hold on to words that may not be serious, maybe i was still that much in love with her and sayang her.

Hey, hope you enjoy the pictures! this is awkward,after showing pics then threw few paragraphs like that. =.=

Sincerely.

Ethan

2011-06-21T10:00:00.002+08:00

10am, day #3 . Breakingdowns are getting less. something not relevant; guess who i called today? Ming, my ex colleague at coffee bean curve. I called because i wanted to find a part time job. Instead, Ming told me, if i am not mistaken, he said i can guarantee you the job, but it's management trainee. i asked for a chicken wing and he gave me something even better. a thigh,a drumstick! Lol. I am trying hard not to get to excited you see. He even said, eh i thought you said you are not into managing people? Well Ming, life's tough and i need to get back on track. I hope i wont let you down. CBTL manager? hmmm sounds exciting already lol. Oh btw,those who care, i'm having an interview this evening say 4pm. AHHHHHHHHHH! =) It's about time that things should go up. I'm thankful at least Ming gave me a chance to do it.

Story that almost didn't make it in mainstream. edited

2011-06-18T11:41:00.007+08:00

Story below is true story based on a guy and a girl,names are fake. Thanks.And admitting mistake is the first step of changing.

Italic fonts are the parts being edited later,memory jog is tough.

Lucas is a typical everyday guy,has every normal guy personalities, who has a sort of long distance Belinda,well depends how you see it. Lucas is a college dropout and Belinda was still a student back then. Of course she is a graduate now,but this story takes us back,what was Lucas' perspective. Lucas found a job,sales oriented,flexible job. At first he hesitated, because of numerous reasons,but he took it anyway. If you're a dropout and your parents stop giving you allowance,any job seems good and Belinda gotta eat too. Lucas understood there was no way $ could have fell from sky and Lucas knew back then Belinda's mom was comparing between Lucas and her daughter's ex. Obviously Lucas lost in every single possible way, it's almost an insult to compare him to Lucas. When he entered Citibank,he was very excited, he told everything to Belinda. Got his 1st potential customer on a Christmas eve,Lucas was very excited. But he also aware that he promised Belinda to go Melaka to spend Christmas together. Yes like everyone could have guessed, Lucas couldnt make it. He was late,tickets were all sold out. He even called Belinda and apologised, but Belinda lost it, she threw tantrum on her. Lucas was upset, why she couldnt understand how important his potential was? it's not like Lucas went to do something irrelevant. So Lucas got to Melaka by travelling by KTM to Seremban and from there he got into a bus that reaches Melaka. They made up, and got through a fun Christmas, which Belinda had one too many to drink and Lucas took care of his drunk girl.

As days gone by,little did Lucas know, Citibank was a gateway to temptations. He was introduced to the beauty of happy hours and socializing. Now Lucas is always going out with colleagues and bosses,drinking it out. The new found freedom has completely changed Lucas. The freedom he once thirst for,he had it in his hands right now.Eventually, he msgs Belinda lesser and lesser. Like any other girl would do, Belinda got upset and lectured Lucas. Lucas does possess a weak spot for Belinda, he took Belinda out for a date. So one fine day, both of them went into a mall, and went into a boutique where they sell good wallets. Lucas has been wanting to buy a wallet, but he all this while he didnt, because most of his $ spent on necessities,Belinda and alcohols. Then Belinda saw a handbag/purse . She was mesmerized by it, Lucas already hating himself why the fuck he has no money to buy it. That though, it did enter into Lucas' priority list. After few walks, Belinda took his man into men's wallet boutique and Lucas of cos found something that he really really fond of. Then they left the store, Lucas was thinking, "ahhh well, i can wait. I get hers first. I owe this much to this girl.Jui duo (cantonese) i eat less drink less,i can pay it off in two months time). Before he could open his mouth, Belinda already said "Buy me that and i'll buy you the wallet. ok?" Lucas was like "oh ok,u sure?if you are,i'm going to buy it now". Lucas saw it in her eyes at the point of time,it was the first, where he saw happiness in her eyes.

Belinda went and get the wallet for Lucas. They both went home happily. What made Lucas even more happy, Belinda's mom acknowledged Lucas' gift and complimented it was nice. By her standard, Lucas knew he made a breakthrough. They can proudly now announced to her mom saying yeah, Lucas has came back to her life and yes, they are dating. Then Belinda got back to Melaka for classes.

Author's memory got a bit tweaked. somewhere in between, Belinda got upset over Lucas that he didnt come find her that often anymore. Lucas couldnt bear seeing her sad, he went and cash advancements(basically loaning from credit card) just to take a cab to go over to Belinda's place and see her.

This is where things about to get very controversial. The author did not edit the story in any way to make it favorable to anyone at all. Besides,the author dont see the point of doing so.

One fine day, Lucas got a call from Belinda that she broke her leg. "haaa. are you sure?might be something else.why dont you go see the doctor first and see what he says,then you call me back ok?" Belinda called to tell her condition and Lucas offered to send her back from Melaka to kl, "Ok,i'll take the next bus to you and i'll send you back tmrw?" Belinda said her mom wanted her to go back on that night itself, and Lucas did call her mom and talked over,and it was decided that it was the night itself that they were to go back to KL. So everything went accordingly, and Belinda texted Lucas to come over to accompany her surgery. Accompanied Belinda and her mom, Lucas did,at hospital getting ready for surgery. Lucas saw his girl burst into tears,then her mom did and Lucas was just barely holding back. Belinda's mom asked Lucas to call his sister to ask for her sis's blessing see if it is Lucas ok with staying late to accompany Belinda. Lucas' sister was ok with the idea as long as Lucas has a few hours of rest before work. Belinda's mom demanded the truth from Lucas,the exact words from Lucas's sister and that's what Lucas told her mom. After understanding the situation, both of them worked out a schedule and Belinda's mom was kind enough to borrow Lucas her car and asked him to go home and rest as Lucas will be coming back after tomorrow's work. As planned, that one week, Lucas has been rotating shifts between her mom and him. There was times that her mom got to the hospital early and asked Lucas to go home and rests more and there was times where her mom was slightly late,which Lucas understood why. And there's one night, Lucas wanted to leave early, because he was about to be introduced to some managers of other banks. His appointment was 9pm,and it was well 9pm and he wanted to leave, Belinda gave him this long pout and puppy eyes, which Lucas couldnt have the heart to leave. He stayed awhile more until her mom called and asked Lucas to go get the porridge from the house and back to hospital for Belinda. He was leaving at that point of time,he wanted to go to other bank, Citibank he couldn't stay. Hence, to Lucas at that point, this opportunity was a golden one. Belinda let Lucas go after he got the porridge. Each time Lucas closes the door, he would peek at her,she was so sad when Lucas left the room. It basically sliced a bit of Lucas' heart.

There was once,Belinda's mom asked Lucas if he can come over to her house to take porridge at 6am.Lucas told either Belinda or the mom that he needed to rest.

So one day,her mom asked back the car and Lucas got no transport to go over to visit Belinda. On the day before Belinda got released from hospital,they were still in argument, but Lucas said sorry, and asked what is the time of her being discharged. She only said morning, Lucas then said, ok,you let me know what time,i'll take lrt to come over. It was lunch hour and Belinda yet to give Lucas a call or text, so Lucas asked Belinda what happened. But Belinda was angry at Lucas, she said they were back at home already. She also added, if Lucas has the heart to come over and help,he would have take the day off himself and come over.

As we know, Lucas now is on debt, an amount where it was 4 digit. Things got tighter, Lucas no longer can go for happy hours unless it's on boss's bill. But one thing Lucas still goes to despite his financial condition,he find it important to release stress because bosses are now asking for figures. Every tuesday night, Lucas goes for futsal to release stress. He didnt go for futsal last week because Belinda's still in hospital. The week where Belinda got back home,Lucas went there once at least to accompany his girlfriend.

On that day itself, Belinda,Belinda's mom and Lucas talked about arrangements to classes. She asked if Lucas can take a couple of days off, Lucas remembered clearly he said "2-3 days should not be a problem, MC can be bought anywhere".

Belinda was very very upset because, it was only once that Lucas came on that week. Lucas was trying to explain why and said things that he didnt mean to. He said " back and forth, i would spend near to 30ringgit, and that could buy me 3 meals". It broke Belinda's heart. Lucas knew he said something so wrong, but his ego his pride was in his way. He couldnt wake up from this thought that he was about to make the biggest mistake of his life. He rejected Belinda's offer to pay for the cab. To Lucas, a guy should provide, not female. Lucas has too much pride and ego at the point, he refused and yeah, they got into another fight. Before things got better, Lucas' friend birthday on the weekend. He was invited to club at that night itself,it was very last minute. So, knowing Belinda will throw tantrum, Lucas done another big mistake, he lied. He lied to Belinda, "baby,i'm sleeping soon. i'm tired. good night. i love you." Now, the only lie in that sentence was "i'm sleeping soon.". Lucas lied,why? because 1) new found freedom is eating him alive 2)it was friend's birthday 3)wouldnt want Belinda to feel left out, as Lucas remembered, he promised to bring her to club with his friends.

Like we all would know, Belinda found out, and was heart broken, she broke up with Lucas. Devastated but he saw it coming. He asked if he was sure,because between Belinda and Lucas,they had this agreement where they shouldn't use "breakup" to win an argument. Belinda said, it was final. Lucas since then,built a lie to himself, he was in denial. He thought he deserved to be understood where he was coming from. He built a lie where he wasn't appreciated for what he had done. He drank whenever he can find a chance, this is his way of keeping himself in denial. Even a concerned friend came to him one day, "eh Lucas, u sure ah you dont want to get back with her?" Belinda even called and asked Lucas back,sent him a long ass email to make him change his mind. In front of his friends, Lucas said no, he doesn't. But actually, every now and then, he cried a little reading the email. The only thing Belinda didnt do was to show up in his doorstep with a long pout and puppy eyes, Lucas was sure to give in if that would have happened. Even then, Lucas was very concern about Belinda's well being. He would login his friend's social networking account to check on Belinda's progress and he would ask his friend how she is. So one day after two months of in denial, Lucas couldnt withhold his feelings anymore, he admitted he still miss Belinda, and he still loves Belinda. so he took his friend's account who added Belinda as friend, he confessed openly exactly that,so Belinda would read it. And so she did, and Lucas chat with her using another name of Lucas,which he once had. Lucas thought Belinda would have remembered and Lucas expected to give away and let her know anyway. Maybe it was never meant to be,Belinda couldn't recall. Things got even worse when Lucas contacted Belinda directly. It was too late. Now Lucas is facing and feeling every single things and feelings that Belinda once went through. Lucas now understood that what he has been doing is wrong, he regretted his doings and finally understood what a girl needs from her boyfriend.

We should thank Lucas for letting his insights and share what he learned from this.

1) Nothing is more important than your loved ones. Not your career,not your friend's birthday, not your freaking hobby.

2)It is not demanding when your girlfriend wants you to call her everyday,texts her,sing to her every night or say i love you to her everynight. Not that she wants to check on you,she wants to know everything about you.

3)It's a fun world out there, agree. Either you dont go out or you bring your girlfriend along. Even if you dont bring her along,pls remember to come back by her side fast.

4) listen to her rants,her dissatisfaction instead of waiting for a chance to get into a fight. Because it hurts to feel that he/she is being taken granted of.

5)turn off your phone whenever you're with her. respect her and she only wants your utmost attention. is that too much to ask?

6)just do whatever she wants for the sense of security,make her feel safe.

One would ask, what would Lucas have done or will do,if given 2nd chance?

here onwards,Lucas would be talking

1)give all my salary to her,let her be my chief financial officer. she might be saving for something else too

2)man up,set my priorities straight. Belinda and her mom should be and only be my priorities

3)Fuck career advancements, i should have stayed behind with Belinda.

4)If Belinda says my friends are bad influence,i would delete all of them and only remain her,her mom and my family's numbers

5)not going out anywhere and with anyone,not without her.

6) pride?ego?what's that? those are worthless. so what if people laugh at me?i'll be having the last laugh when i have my love and you struggle to find yours.

You may held Lucas responsible,he typed these himself and can be used for evidence.

You guys might not think this suitable or not healthy, well the author and I has two words for you, "grow up". In the end, who would be there when you hit rockbottom? your family. Belinda was with me every single day.They both hate me to guts, and i just can't accept the fact that i've done all this and this took me 2 fucking months to wake up?I'm sorry and i regret my doings. I believe first step in changing your mistakes is to admit that you're wrong. Thank you for reading,at least gave me a chance to put it into words. And yes,i love you baby. after things i said to you and you said to me,i still love you.

Cast: Lucas,Belinda,Belinda's mom.

Kelefeh: Lucas's sister.

Author: Ethan.

Sincerely,

Liew Chee Tat,

*will be edited every now and then because memory jog is hard for the author,he has weak memories.

Seriously, thanks for reading,and i am really sorry. I love you baby.

Memories of nobody

2011-06-12T19:48:00.003+08:00

#80 u always checked my ipod if I changed the wallpaper. Guess u didn't know,to me,that picture is the most beautiful of yours.how could I?

#90 wedding song was The Spill Canvas - Aim Snap Fall

#1 miss the smeechy I first knew last year. Miss my baby.

#100 glad my last sentence wasn't "I'll never talk to you again". I managed to tweetjack and made you read that I love you. No more regrets.

#95 still remember you went taiwan for vacation, made me know how is it like to understand "I miss you like crazy"

#10 love our phone conversations, talked almost everything. Gossips, some even put myself into trouble.

#54 remember how we used to plan our house? Expensive beds? 3 dogs? Double storeys? White paint?

#3 I'm a sucker for your phrase and pout.

#99 you always complained that I'm not romantic enough. How is telling I love you every night is not romantic?

#25 for u,my best friend for 14years turned enemy. sometimes it disappoints me when you still can say my friends are more important.

#61 we used to fight who's going to sleep to our favourite spot in the bed,the spot which is closer to the wall.

#4 remember singing songs to each other,it was something like we were singing each other to sleep over the phone.

#64 woke up early morning and went to the market together,then you cooked bakkutteh for me. I felt erm..happiest man in the world.

#88 don't think you'll ever find out about this, but actually I was that close in buying a ring.

#9 to be honest,I hate kissing you on the forehead,because it reminded me of your ex. Did it anyway, because I want you to be happy

#55 remember sudoku? I lost to you purposely so that I can buy you the choc that you wanted. I actually won you and a date.

#12A used to brainstorm ways to get you on skype. Would be fucking emo if you said no or didn't online.

#11 exclamation mark day? That was cute yet annoying. Every sentences ended with !s.

#33 always liked the way you tell me everything going to be ok.

#73 don't know if this counts, I insisted our first date was the one in midvalley,MPH bookstore. Nobody calls it outing ok?

You did yours, i did mine. Fair. I dont owe you anything anymore.

One last time,

Smeethan.

One at a time.

2011-06-10T12:05:00.004+08:00

Decided not to name this post,perhaps there're too many things on my mind till the point where i do not know where to start.

There was a point in my life where i had almost everything if not everything. I had a good relationship with my family, a loving girlfriend, a career and my friends were awesome(you guys still rock!) Things seem like they will be on course to a well scripted happy ending like in the movies. Speaking of movies, there are plots and climax(?). And you usually, after the climax(?) things will be stagnant and there's the ending. Which unfortunately for me, the climax isn't the part where i thought i had everything, it is where i lost almost everything. It's rather discouraging because things happened so fast, today where i came to realize, i don't know how to react to them. I literally do not know how to react. I hope i am wrong in this, i hope this is just another plot.

Had an interview today, it sucked balls. Complaining must stop right here as it wont get me far. In the end, i am wondering when all these nonsense will end so that i can get back on track in life. If you are experiencing something similar, well, my strategy is handle one thing at a time. If you have other suggestions, do pm me. Would appreciate that, till then, one at a time. What the hell, i am going to name this post one at a time. There's this song about this one at a time? Or is it one step at a time? Whatever,ironic.

"There's no chance,no destiny,no fate that can handle the firm resolve of a determined soul". Ella Wheeler Wilcox.

Ethan.

A helping hand and a light.

2011-06-01T11:12:00.005+08:00

If there's a time where a person could make a wish out of a lamp, now should be a perfect time for me. If God exists, i really need Him now. Please show me a sign or person to guide me how can i be a better man or which path should i take? I need a reason to continue to be a firm believer, a better tomorrow.

Ethan.

Every ending,there's a new beginning.

2011-05-22T23:09:00.002+08:00

Hi is a conversation opening which always be followed with a "how are you?" or "how's life?".

So, here i am, meeting you. How's my life? Roller coaster ride. I haven't mislead you now have i? I have no means to be cheesy, but there were moments where my life did feel like it had hit rock bottom. With a great personal financial crisis,work,family and relationship problems all decided to come at one go, this has every right to be a contender for best "rock bottom" moments.

Well,this year so far, one good thing happened to me, was getting to know what i really wanted in my life, that is to be good at what i am doing. Let's face it, i'm 24 with low qualification, you can't blame me for wanting to concentrate on what i am doing. Some people did ask me, "eh do you plan to continue study? It's only 1 year left.". I couldn't answer them. The only way i see myself finishing my studies would be using my own hard-earned $. Never mind that, that plan is still far away. One thing i have learned is compromising should not be a one way street and being true to oneself is important. Don't try to be someone else just to please others.

So, i have resigned from Citibank Berhad Mortgage Department. Well, if you must know, i started in Citibank on 13 December 2011, 9am. And i tendered resignation on 19 May 2011, 10am. My experience in Citibank was more to fun and learning. It wasn't about getting sales. It was unfortunate that i couldn't find a way to overcome the bank's ~~defects~~ competitions. Hey, i did get to know some cool people over there! All of KL06 team, Joe, and Puchong branch's Kelvin and Marcus. Citibank also made me realized the importance of releasing stress. No kidding. Big boss would aim you and shoot your boss upside down,then your boss would shoot you upside down. Guys,be thankful that you are in puchong! Every Tuesday, if it is possible, i will go for futsal session with YAB Kok. That's how i release stress.

What am i blabbering about. Sorry! Wanted to type more but i am feeling very very sleepy.

Next episode: Li Ann's Birthday party @ Zouk

the revival.. sort of.

2010-10-05T23:07:00.006+08:00

This is what happened the past few months.

Length of a post does not matter.

I can now say i know how to make coffee and latte ;)
Oh ya,i love you.

mistakes.

2010-04-17T20:56:00.004+08:00

Hey,sorry for not updating this for a long time.it's been awhile i know.A lot had happened,and i dont know where to start.All i can say it can only be described as a roller coaster ride,but it's just that it's more downs than ups.Ok,if you've noticed,the mood now is slowly going to turn into emo.Ah well,can't blame others for own silly mistakes.Mistakes you do,some yeah you might be able to correct it.Some just dont,you need to earn the credit back and i'm a strong believer of that.No matter how hard it is,you must earn it back.

There's this line in the song i happen to come across in Youtube while listening to Jet's Look What You've Done; Plain White T's A Lonely September.It goes, "i know it's not the smartest thing to do,we just cant seem to get it right,but what i wouldnt give to have one more chance tonight,one more chance tonight".

This post is short.I hope you understand what i am going through and i'm just not in the mood.I promise i'll update one long happy one the next time i drop by.I shall end this post with a sigh.

Sigh,
Ethan.

*smeethan

2010-03-10T21:10:00.006+08:00

Actually,to be honest,i got no idea how to blog about my day.Jan told me to inject some feelings into it."err like how?"*warning,might be cheesy for you guys*"I dont think there's a word or two maybe,to properly describe my feelings". :P

Today was our first date,well officially.We went for a movie,Valentine's Day. ok we are slow :P
There's this part in the beginning of the movie where Ashton Kutcher proposed to Jessica Alba,now i cant remember the exact words (no thanks to my wonderful memory),but i think he said that his father once told him if you feel that the girl is way too good for you,marry her.At that very moment,i thought,not out loud of course,i have this very feeling as well.the marry part,i'll save it for later.I do feel that i'm the luckiest guy on earth to be able to have you beside me.I bet my close friends won't argue with me on this one.Maybe this is my low self esteem talking but dont get me wrong.

For every time i hold your hands i am smiling inside.

Hello!

2010-03-09T18:41:00.000+08:00

2010-03-01T10:13:00.002+08:00

at this point of my life,i know i'm happy. =)

ps:Melaka is a very hot place,the sunset over there is awesome.

consider this locked.

2010-01-30T02:39:00.003+08:00

xnt kdes dzqkx,akhrr.vgx vntke xnt en sgzs sn ld?

They say there's no what if in love.interesting.

2010-01-29T04:16:00.003+08:00

Bliss ahhhhhh,it's been awhile.Dont leave me again.

i just cant sing -____-"

2010-01-25T20:51:00.006+08:00

23rd January 2010,OneUtama.

Should have been an update about new year eve,but what to do?Lau yet to give me the pictures.Please dont lecture me about me prefer to blog with pics.ROAR!

Canton-i

Waiting can die.

Sean and Blene

Yes,i did this.So?

Ethan: This one is definitely bigger
Sean:Nope,i think this is bigger

Best place to go after lunch.

this is nothing, seriously.

Ban yeh no 1

Banyeh no.2

Banyeh no.3

We went to watch Jackie Chan's Spy Next Door.It was not TOO bad,only predictable ending was a bit turn off that's all.And he's getting old :(

Nak jadi fallen angel wor.

After movie.

With lau and zhe fei along.

ahem* Ryan Reynolds i mean.

Couldnt elaborate more.Rushing assignment(ya ya as usual).

Ethan.

Rock Scissors Paper

2009-12-30T13:08:00.023+08:00

This post is dedicated to the newly formed team, also known as Rock Scissors Paper team.

For your information,Chia lost to us in that round which matters the most in that moment of our lives.

24th December 2009.Big day for all of us for obvious reasons. It was Christmas Eve and it was a day before the birth of Lisa and Becks.Becks came to pick me up from my place at around 4pm,then we headed to Leon's place immediately.We NEARLY got lost on our way,luckily my memory didnt fail me at that time.

We went to The Gardens and Midvalley, Leon wanted to buy a shirt for himself but in the end he bought baju and seluar sekali. *geleng geleng* While waiting for him,me and Becks went around. And i saw others were snapping picture of the tree,so being a little kiasu myself, i took one.

After Hhl and Lisa met up at the trainstation,they decided to walk and have dinner on their own. Sigh,tinggal 3 ekor single,mana tempat boleh pergi. We went Nando's for dinner, which that ~~cibai~~ waiter forgot to place our order.We waited for an hour and bodoh bodoh thought the place was too busy.

Me and Leon,Tap Tap Revenge

Guess you know who was winning

Didnt know that ordering something pleasant would be "not so brave"

After dinner, we were way behind the schedule.Lisa belum habis shop,Hhl couldnt possibly make Lisa go any faster(might be wrong if you keep on repeating the sentence in your head).I dont know how they managed to find time to strike a pose somewhere near the tree -.-"

Lisa with the pose

So,we end up late,and there were extra charges i think.At first our room kena share with bunch of strangers. Then suddenly somehow we manage to switch to a bigger space and only with one table.There were almost 30 of us,and to be honest,i dont even know half of them. -.-"

This is a start.I'm a future CEO.

When everyone was still quiet and shy.
Honestly,this is one of my favorite pictures.
Couple of the year.
Chia,Lisa,Hhl and Bear.
Half of us..
Gang: YAMMMMMMMMMMM SENGGGG!
CheeTat:CRAWLINGGGG IN MY SKINNNNNNN *cough* eh?
Lady boss, Adeline Ng.
Lau: Let me introduce,this is chuck bass
CheeTat:Eh faster la,i can barely open my eyes anymore
Leon:*Let me sneak out suddenly and strike a cute pose sin*

Lau: Haha!This is the best time to take pic of the myth
Hhl:We are the back side boys!
Chia: 1 kiss rm50.Not negotiable
Sean: You only get to see me 3 times.When i arrived,when i was back at the base drinking,and closing time.
Lau:I'm number one.I'm MVP tonight.
ps:I dont know why there's the white dot there.-.-"
Chia: Why la 1 kiss rm50 aso no ppl want?Let me test on you Leon
Leon: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO (>.<) <--dont u think this look exactly like him in the pic? Zhe Fei: Nonit run la,I'm holding you la.Sei mei! Becks: Lesson number 1,never fail to pose even there's something extra ordinary happening.This is how the back side boys roll.
Chia: Maybe because i cant dance,mari try.
Leon: DAMMIT U KNOCKED MY HEAD! (>.<) <--again,same with the pic XD Zhe Fei : Sorry folks,we're actually showing how not to dance.
CheeTat: Wah dai lou..faster tekan la,my eyes cant take it anymore
Zhe Fei:HAHAHAHAHAA..Leon,you suck!
Becks: Lesson number 2,always think that you're the best.
Leon: "Tonight i'm falling,and i cant get up"
the rest:Why am i taking picture with these fools?
Group photo (original version)
Ok officially my eyes sudah sampai limit
Leon's act cute pose number 2!btw lupa nama 3 perempuan tu
Last attempt to make my eyes stay open,clearly it wasnt a weak attempt :P
Ignore these 3,pay attentionto the background ^^
It's amazing they still have that amount of energy to fool around
Chia: CB u ask me come but u went missing
Sean: Sorry lor..i got to do something
I'm still holding on!
This is soooo not a candid

Before i go on,i would like to say that when someone is under influence of alcohol,they tend to do something they would never do when they're not under the influence.Like the pictures below;

Hhl labeled us as despo,we called ourselves victims.Victim number 1.
Unfortunately,i'm number two.
Victim number 3
Ok fine he didnt look as if he was the victim here.BUT he is.Victim number 4
two bodyguards and one assassin.
This one memang pure victim!
HAHAHAHAHAAH!!!

Until now i dont know the white shirt girl's name.Everyone thought that two girls were Sean's friend.Rupa-rupanya, after we came out then only, Sean's friend went and approached them. -.-"

The next morning was hellish for me,i was the only one of the bunch who vomitted.NOT FAIR!We went for our first meal of the day at a dim sum restaurant around KDU area.

Leng zai number 1 and 2
Stoning..

Before heading back to kuantan, Lau,Zhe Fei,Leon and me went to OneUtama.Lau wanted to find something for you-know-who while i still dont really care what's happening around me.On the trip back,Leon used his laptop to play all his songs and at the end of the trip,he spammed us with Owl City's Fireflies which he still managed to get the lyrics wrong at the end of the day after like GAZILLION times of playback. -___-"

I should end this now,tmrw's bus is at 9.30am and i have to be there by around 8.30.Oh belum pack my bag,DAMMIT!

I didn't elaborate on how and why the rock scissors paper team was formed.I believe that some things are better left untold.At least not to the public.

Next episode ; New Year Eve's outing.Yet to have a title for it.

the week that i dont get to sleep more than 6 hours.

2009-12-15T11:41:00.013+08:00

Before i start,i nak shoutout kat those ah bengs..Pls do not embarrass yourself on national tv.It's You'll Never Walk Alone. NOT THAT!Dah la kalah portsmouth 2-0.cibai ah bengs.

Pavillion with Leon and Janice.It took me almost 3 hours and half to reach there(macam kl balik kuantan),don't ask.Long story cut short,i got lost.I was in chow kit once,and ended up at ampang.How? i dont know.

Choosing Christmas cards for friends.Shawn is getting a new year card instead.

Since it took me that long to reach,takkan la dinner + christmas cards then terus balik.Movie,and we chose Fung Wan 2, at 12am.And when we got our tickets, it was only 10pm.So deciding coffee over beer,we sat at starbucks and rot till 12am.That movie sucked by the way,wasted total 4 hours of our lives.

Leon,waiting for sms.

She who took my ipod

Not forgetting this epic drawing, Leon drew me a map directing me from his place to mont kiara which in the end tak guna juga.

Shell looked so small in there.

Friday night, MOS had an event which we met two friends of Becks.Event sucked so hard, the best moment was when it ended.After the event,the night finally kicked off.

Jangan complain,we used camera phone.

Meet Lennon,the guy between me and Voon Voon.

Lau: Say nothing,let the picture do the talking.

No,we were not looking at Becks' "happy tool".Seriously.

MOS was horrible that night.Determined not to let things end tat way,Lau again rallied us BU troops to go club on the following day.This time, Phuture(sorry if get the name wrong),since i manage to ask two "girls" to join us.Little did they know that that two girls were my cousin.While waiting for becks to arrive,we snapped some pics.

Mine and Leon's.

My dance partner, Hhl.

Sleepless nights started to show its effects

Introducing my two beautiful cousins.Wye Jing and Wye Lum.

That night was definitely better than MOS.Lau with his suicidal mission and ended up talking with random strangers and puking along the way to the car.That's it,i left out some important parts maybe, but i dont care.I'm off to bed now.

Next episode; "Rock Scissors Paper team". Seriously.

Cactus i shall burn them all

2009-11-23T23:29:00.002+08:00

They asked, "how does it feel to love someone who loves someone else?" After a deep breath, I answered, "It's like hugging a cactus, the tighter you embrace, the more it hurts..."

The more you read the quote,the more it makes sense eh?

2009-11-16T00:25:00.002+08:00

2012,i watched it today at Tropicana Mall.From what i've heard,it's a good wake up call for those is living in denial.For me, "WOOHOOO,billions of people going to die with me on the same day!".Again,who say i'm going to die alone?

And i tagged along with my sis and her bf to Honda showroom.Sunday morning,i didnt expect there would be anyone there to be honest.Those salesperson would really judge you like they judge a book by its cover. XD

What i saw;

Couple A,drove an ancient car.A sales lady was serving them,decent looking 25/26 year old.
Couple B,drove a Honda car.A sales man came to serve them,early 30s.

That man first greeted the couple with a polite smile and handshake.After introducing himself,they went straight for a test drive,that man opened the door for them.

That lady,was talking talking and talking.Maybe she's trying very hard,i understand.Naturally,that couple also requested for a test drive.She looked as if she was in a hurry and walked to the car.She left the couple way behind -.-"

Argh,i think i just broke my cd-rom with my elbow. -.-" What's worse?It's not even working.Sorry i think my last few posts bore you guys,and fuck i dont even care =)
You who convinced me taking up guitar,i hope you're happy because my fingers arent the same as they used to be.

shoutout to you,who went offline because of sudden emo.Take care and don't think too much about it.

2009-11-14T01:34:00.002+08:00

i guess i'll leave it for tomorrow,a long post that is.For now,i'm committed to learn guitar.Shoutout to you who "convinced" me to learn it through youtube.If you're reading,yes you.wat the fuck hahahaha!By the way,on repeat mode itunes,Eminem-Beautiful.His best yet.Rare that a non rock song to impress me.

your numbness,
chee tat

thank you.

2009-11-08T22:03:00.002+08:00

i'm here blogging,when i should be reading the text book. =(

Week in kuantan was boring.It got worse when sky decided to pour tears on me,heavily.Needless to say,rock climbing was impossible.Even a rare day of bright clear afternoon,the "i dont know what to do in kuantan",Abelene, got loads of chores -.-" benci!Jerry yet to reach kuantan and others,let's just not talk about them.I blamed it all on Clement Cheam.Kuantan is not the same whenever he's not around.

"where to go?cc?tc?somewhere just to hang?who to call?" *scroll scroll scroll*

Ah Soon?Budak almost 24/7 busy.Clement?Budak busy dating tak nak balik kuantan,fingers to you .l. .l.
Man Chan?Reliable but there's a price to pay,constant sexual harassed by him during the way back home.Constant rubbing on my thigh,that counts as sexual harassment right?It's amazing he able to do that even driving on manual.I guess all the training he gone through starts to show results.And if you are wondering, "if he's driving auto?"He did once,sigh.My thigh felt different ever since. XD
Continuous bugging and i got Lau to go tc with me one rainy night.Gay dou -.-"

Saturday night i guess was the "most happening".It was the funny man,Chia's birthday.He held what most people would call as a "wedding" instead of birthday dinner.10 tables were filled with ppl.Awkwardness as i know only a handful of people,needless to say the ones that i'm close with.Ah Soon,Jerry and Hhl among the ones who came,and whole night we've been sitting together.After dinner,Chia belanja-ed us After 7.No elaboration on that one as the story stayed there.

No pics!Sorry.Unless i manage to get the one and only pic from Chia which i doubt.OH yeah,i've always thought that monday = 10th of november,fuck i went college library for some last minute memorizing(let's be honest,most ppl nowdays dont understand what they read,they blindly memorize) and got extremely stressed.I later found out when i text my classmate for some group study,"i'll come at 2","eh?2?hrm 2pm starts.Come earlier","Hrm tomorrow.not today" and it ends with me texting him,"WAT THE FUCK!".
Maybe the man above giving me another chance to read.No more slacking.Thus,i shall end this post now and sleep.Dont judge me,i woke up early just to go library!I need some sleep so that i can be more productive later.

How to annoy faithful readers?

2009-10-15T23:39:00.006+08:00

It's easy.Just get them to break a code.As mentioned,only for faithful and curious readers who just cant seem to ignore XD

pvs mbtu ljtt dbssjfe uif gmbwps pg upcbddp,
ju xbt b cjuufs bme tbe tnfmm,
bcpvu uijt ujnf upnpsspx,
j xpoefs xifsf xjmm zpv cf,xip xjmm zpv cf uijoljoh pg?

opx j tujmm tjoh b tbe mpwf tpoh,
voujm j dbo tjoh b ofx tpoh

uif npnfou jo ujnf uibu tuppe tujmm tffnt up cf uszjoh up npwf
cvu j epou xbou up gpshfu bozuijoh
bcpvu uijt ujnf upnpsspx
j xjmm cf efgjojufmz cf dszjoh,j'mm qspcbcmz cf uijoljoh bcpvu zpv

hint:The way to break the code is found in a manga.Biggest hint without leaving the site,would be at last line.

ps : Thanks for wasting your life trying to break this.lol

October 10th

2009-10-12T15:49:00.020+08:00

First of all,i would like to thank everyone that came to my party.I love you guys =)

So the day finally came.It was 10th of October.Clement and I went to Kelana Jaya,as planned, to pick Leon up but only to find out

Leon:"Eh,you guys go first,i'll meet you in Giant",
Me:"Who are you with?"
Leon: "Ada lahh"

>.< The Giant we went to,which is in PBD can only be described with two words.Small and sad.So we decided to drive our way back to Kelana Jaya,Leon told us that there's this big ass Giant over there and it's near to the station.Thanks to Leon's memory,we missed the turning and we had to make a big ass U-turn..we were sorta tensed because bear in mind,we're supposed to reach Mont Kiara around 3 something.

12.30 pick up Leon-->3pm pick up Jan -->3.30 reach Mont Kiara }this was the "plan".

You know,we've always thought that shopping can only be slow whenever there's a girl.So i told myself not to worry,how slow can 3 guys be doing some shopping?I tell you now,it is slow!

Leon expressing himself at the lamb session

This is how the cart looks like after some time.

Leon: "5 bottles enough ah for 20 ppl?"
Clement: "If me,i say more than enough lor,i dont drink that much of coke"
Me : *baik jgn voice out opinion,i've been fooling around*

By fooling around,i really meant fooling around.I was acting like a 5 year old pushing the cart.Ok fine i was standing on it while Clement pulling it around.I didnt even helped to push the cart.Bla bla bla..
I do think we're the happiest customers who about to pay for the stuff.Siap posing lagi tu sebelah counter. :P

Leon and his finger.Sigh..and they call him a law student. :P

So by the time we got back to my place and threw everything by the poolside,it's 4 something.So much for the "plan".

Husband and wife for the day.Gembira muka Leon tu

It was unexpectedly busy for me due to the crowd's inconsistent time of reaching.A minute i was up there,then the other minute i was down.

The midvalley gang was the ones who arrived first if i'm not mistaken.Leona brought the doughnuts for everyone while waiting for the food to be cooked.

We miss our secondary school days,therefore we chose the charcoal approved by SABS.Screw you SMART,did u approve anything??!!

Thanks to them,we get to eat.Seriously.

Not to forget,chef for the day and day after.

Some pictures should best describe by their comments.Like this :

Abelene Phua:im so hungry now i would kill for that cheam bbq chicken..
Lisa Stephanie:u look like a cute lil boy..only a vry huge one...

Hsien Loong:lol... a lil boy!

Night came,and the chef probably got confused between wings and blene's hair.We shouldnt tease him,he was probably pissed because there's no one able to take over his place.

Chose this picture personally because come on la..Janice being cute here.Mana boleh tak upload?!
Look,Abelene was smiling pretty nicely not knowing she was next in line being thrown into the pool.

Sean said he is the hottest in MOS

And everyone joined Abelene to make her seems less lonely in the pool.

Dont you dare have this idea that being chef of the day,you dont need to be thrown.Minister of Law caught on camera.

Chef's plate for the night.By looking at it makes me hungry.

How can a person having the almost same facial expression for 4 or 5 pics in a row?Almost impossible eh?Bachelors Union proved that impossible is nothing!Check the pics out.

Jan,Foo,Ment and Hui Zhen

Then came Jerry

Then came everyone..with different poses

Yeah,i was serious about everyone coming in.

We closed our eyes to make Sean's looked bigger

The famous teapot pose.

Sean:I want em all!Shoo tat..shoo!
Tat:Oh come on,let me have one.

bachelors in the pool

Lisa,Heong,Sue Ann,Li Ann and Adeline.

"bonding" ruined.

Should i put a poll based on this picture?"Vote for your hottest"

Cake.I doubt that anyone would miss it, ____ turns 22! What!?
Culprit: Chee Tat
Reason:simply because we wanted to celebrate more than one person's birthday. :P

Guess only blind ones couldnt figure for was the 2nd person.

BU GROUP HUG!!Eh?! Decoy?Kok Wai got thrown into the pool after the fake group hug. :P There was a picture of Kok Wai kissing me on the cheek,but sorry,it shall be remained unseen by the public.

After party,we went to MOS.We saw some old friends back in our secondary school days.Dancing and drinking,before you know it,it was that time again.Time to leave >.<

Complete group picture.Almost.There's no Kok Wai.

Again i must remind the readers,due to some shaky hands or just pure noob camera person,the pictures were not so good.And one more thing,brotherly love as described by Jan. =)

I should take the responsibility to describe this picture properly to avoid any misunderstanding.Lau was actually very drunk,so we have to pin him down in order to keep him still.What we were doing was Sean,preventing Lau's head from further random banging therefore he stood right above Lau.As Leon's strength alone clearly insufficient,Clement went head first directly to Lau's stomach area, Alvin and I were pushing downwards to lend further strength to what Clement was doing.This is clearly not what it seems like to be.Clearly at first glance,this would seem to be a very obscene pic but hopefully after reading my explanation things got cleared.

Dam i ran out of stories.

Supposed to be girls' only pic.But hey,we didnt care =)

Believe it or not,we were just hugging each other.I just cant seem to explain why their expressions showed otherwise.tsk!

Sean to hhl and alvin: Let's join the rugby team.
Me: Dude,ufo man!
Lau: i know i know,it flew by like this..swuushhhh!
the rest: dumbass!

Who say i'll end up alone?heh heh :P

Lau:Better not let anyone sees this

According to Jan,force were applied in order for this pic to happen.So we shall all ignore this picture.

You'll get diabetes by just looking at this picture.

Mini group hug!Sad ratio though 2:1

Tat: I lost my key la where is it?

Jan and Blene.

Husband and wife so they say.

Husband and his secret affair

Guess i screw Leon over. :P

*poof* shit it was just my imagination?!Leon and I still buddy buddy?!

Blene,Jan,Hui Zhen and Ethan.

We reached back to Lau's place at 6am sharp.Sigh..There were leftovers during the barbecue,so we decided to cook them for lunch.Lau and Sean went to subang to pick the rest while Clement was cooking for us.Well,i did help out a lil.Bet you regret eating after looking at the pics.

Even MOD is afraid of oil and smoke.

here's the lamb. =) There's a reason i didnt eat any of those.muwahahah

there was nothing wrong with wings though.Yummy!Fishballs and sausages were covered.

The gang watching Click after the meal.Lisa was caught crying at the end of the movie.

I shall then end this post with the celebrity of that day,Bruno.

Seriously,i can't read minds.

2009-10-08T19:15:00.012+08:00

something that could be done within 10 seconds was not done.There was no excuse in the world that can be used,at least none that could keep me in wonderland.I feel bad for not updating my blog,it seems like i've abandoned it for quite sometime.There were some untold stories and pictures that were not posted =)

Therefore,brace yourself.These are not for the ones with a weak heart.If i were to choose a word to describe these pics,hmm like a newspaper one-word headline ;

Shocking!
by: Chee Tat (or should i put a fake name in case this is too controversial?)
ch33tat@bachelorsunion.blogspot.com

KUANTAN:After a weekend back in his hometown,the reporter witnessed a couple of incidents with his own eyes that what could only be described as stated above,shocking.Indeed,it is only used to describe murders,tortures and breakups, but this incident is no different.

It was reported that 2 adults what a normal human being would describe their behaviour as expressing their gay love in public.According to Sean,who went to Teluk Cempedak to celebrate Moon Cake Festival, "I was speechless..Clearly i wasn't expecting this tonight.It is almost as if they were insulting the chinese culture.What made it worse was that they're both chinese!Thanks to them,i will never celebrate this festival the same way again."-Reuters.

SUBANG:A gay couple was spotted on swings together.It was believed that they got into an arguement around the swing area where screamings and shoutings were heard.A person who was on his way to 7eleven,does not want to be named,called the police.
"I was afraid that things would get worse,as i saw they were children on the swings as well,"says the passerby.One of the child was brave enough to answer one of my questions,he said, "I heard they were talking about one of them not using something during night time.It got louder and i quickly ran off."-Reuters

You can see the children at the background wearing purple shirt.Ya ya,he's a bit oversized for a 8 year old.

While i was in the area,i went to Sunway Pyramid for a drink.What i saw was a small audition for Dancing With the Stars here in Malaysia.I couldnt believe that it was not covered by any types of media in this country,well i was lucky enough to meet two of the contestants.Do they look familiar to you? :P

I wish i can shove these fingers into their back door.

"I couldnt believe that i was not chosen.You know what they call me back home?BBTT u motherbitches."

The chosen two were practising the dance moves.He can only watch with jealousy.

Ini tidak berkaitan dengan yang hidup dan mati.Ini adalah rekaan semata mata untuk hiburan sekalian.Harap maklum.

Starring : Leon Gan Han Chen
Lau Kah Shaun
Ho Hsien Loong
Sean Hooi
Chew Boon Soon

2009-09-24T22:50:00.001+08:00

it's was a shame that i didnt get to know all of you.good bye,you were my mistake yet again.

Day two edited*

2009-09-20T14:23:00.005+08:00

It was 8am.After we had or breakfast,we headed into a place called Angkor Thom and here consist of Bayon(where the famous stone faces located at) and Baphuon.At first i spent a lot of time getting a good shot at the face,but only later the tour guide told us that there's plenty similar ones further in.Well it's only one of the 5 gates, :P These 5 gates ,each represents something different.It was in mandarin,but roughly she said that if a general won a war,he comes in one entrance,and if lose,he'll come in through a different entrance.Ada orang mati also have to use only a specific entrance or exit.
And of cuz we went the Elephant Terrace and Terrace of Leper King( if i'm not mistaken).It was one hell of a walk as we went Ta Keo as well.They say the stairs there are the least steep compare to the others.I see no difference man. >"< .Normally they exit the place through victory gate.I wonder how ugly is the "death"gate if there's one. Pictures wise,today is a good day for them.This is only part one of the day two,and i think i can beat wikitravel in terms of quantity and quality :P

1.38pm over here now,and we're resting in the hotel.We're leaving again 3.30pm for Angkor Wat.Alright time to sleep.Catch ya tonight ;)

Night came and it's time to tell you people about Angkor Wat.1st thing you'll notice,there's no steep stairs for you to climb.Thank god,cuz i realized that my legs are screaming each time i lift them up. Renovation is going on there,right in the middle and tallest part.Sigh,that was also one of the best spots for sunsets.Nampaknya saya tak de jodoh dengan sunset la.Pictures were alright,i manage to find a few spots similiar to the ones showed in wikitravel but i am not sure if my pictures won wikitavel's. :x

Just when the 35 degree Celsius started to take its toll on me,we went to a place called Dead Fish.To those that have plans to come,this is a must try restaurant ;) I had tempura and pork steak.Excellento!!!!! A friendly reminder though,better bring ur own drinks there.Manyak ants laaa. Other than that,the food and the environment best sial!Before coming back to the hotel for the desperate bath,we went to the Angkor night market.Whole dam bloody market consist only 4 items ;
1.miniature statues
2.Handbags
3.Same design of shirts at each fucking stall.I'm serious,pls do believe me.
4.Probably fake silver items

And as promised,i'm here blogging about it.Sigh,i wish you were here to listen rather than reading this.Btw,did i tell you that there's not even one star in the sky of cambodia?

with regards,
Chee Tat

Day one. edited

2009-09-19T23:10:00.004+08:00

it's 1011pm over here in Cambodia.Those pesky hotel works closing lights around my area just make me realize that it's time to sleep.So after i checked into this Tara Angkor,the 1st place i went was The Killing Fields (Cheoung Ek), (About 17km south of Phnom Penh). This is where the Khmer Rouge killed many thousands of their victims during their four-year reign of terror. Today the site is marked by a Buddhist stupa packed full of human skulls - the sides are made of glass so the visitors can see them up close. There are also pits in the area where mass graves were unearthed. It is a serene yet somber place.Yeah stole it somewhere in wikitravel.Can you picture a place where they kumpul all the skulls in one gigantic box looking thingy?Ewww goosebumps :P
I saw sunset for the first time(sort of) at Phnom Bakheng,where i climbed my ass up and the temple-like stair case couldnt be any more pain in the ass.Ended up didnt get any good pics because of my worried sis said "Eh dont climb liao,go find dad first."Sigh! In case you wondered,er there's only one OR two pic of the sun set.AND NO,it's not a good picture.I being bitchy,told this to my eldest sis,and she told me"nvm la,ada lagi sunset spots,take until u die aso can".Cb,different feel geh hou mou?!Then again,i forgot the name of the place that i went dinner at.Well at least i took lotsa pics of the performers.Can't wait to show you guys pictures of the places i went today but you all have to bear with my poor photography skills.
Jan told me nobody will care about me forgetting name of places.And i promised to say this out loud in my blog.Janice is pretty.There you go.I'll be back tomorrow night,hopefully in one piece.
Got to go now,bloody hotel off the air cond at the internet area.I get the idea,but i dont think the 2 girls beside me who playing solitaire get the idea though.LOL.

Good night,Chee Tat.

2009-09-08T21:59:00.002+08:00

I was a fool,and i am still.There,i updated my blog.

2009-09-06T17:06:00.006+08:00

Your thoughts alone matters.If only i know

Bachelor's Union Saturday Gone Wild. updated

2009-08-30T22:21:00.029+08:00

I would like to tell readers in advance,due to laziness and fatigue,some of us just dont seem like themselves(they don't act themselves or they just look plain silly) in pictures.And of cuz,there're 130 over pics,i decided to just pick those that best described the situation.

Alright,some pics i have yet get from others.So from time to time,this post might change.Is that one or two pics describe that particular event.So what is this B.U Saturday Gone Wild event?What is Bachelor's Union in the first place?Here,you can find our homepage and about B.U Saturday Gone Wild,the initial plan was ; Plan : Paintball-Dinner-Party-Get drunk-Sleep.Yes we are serious.

Start Time:	Saturday, August 29, 2009 at 12:00pm
End Time:	Sunday, August 30, 2009 at 6:00am
Location:	Kuala Lumpur

But we just love to confirm last minute so we screwed up our initial plan.So on Saturday evening,we told each other to meet up in sunway pyramid at 7pm for dinner. At 6.13pm,Leon and Ah Soon came to my place and gave me a ride to sunway.If you wonder what time we had dinner,i think probably around 8 something?Thanks to Hui Zhen and Clement,we got pics during the dinner.

Hui Zhen.

Clement: "I wonder.."
Hui Zhen:"You're silly"
Adeline: "No, i think both are u are silly"
Becks:"Look away Chee Tat,or else you are silly as well"
Chee Tat:"MUST RESIST..dam i gave into temptation"

went back to my seat and took a pic with Leon who enjoyed himself the whole night telling me how great Chelsea was.

Left to right; Becks,Adeline and Shaun

Chung Han,Soo Wai and Leon

i think leon was pissed because Chelsea yet to score

Leon's finger,pls ignore it.And that's me.

Ah Soon and Hhl

Yeah despite of our hunger,we still have time to play with the camera and pose for camera.

They say we dine in hell,if this is hell,well i sure don't mind a second time.

and i thought i was the slowest in eating.
Clement:"Must eat faster before they start to take pic again"

Clement:"Dammit"Until today i'm still confused why Kok turned up that nightKok,Leon,Chung Han,Me,Ah Soon and Hhl.

Clement:"OMG I WANT TO FINISH MY FOOD"

After dinner,all the guys went to Hhl's place(we claimed it as our B.U's headquater).All of us were preparing ourselves for M.O.S.
Unfortunately,the night was quite erm "lost",only a couple of pics taken.And this is the part i say i might edit later on if i do get the remaining pics. We went in around 11 plus and after everything we reached Hhl's house around 5am.

Again left to right; Hui Zhen,Clement and Becks

ya i know. :PThis should be the last time he smiled that night.
absolutely no memory of this pic
Lau,Leon,Chung Han and Clement raping Sean.
Adeline joined the funat last Lau fenced off the competition and i quote from him in facebook "My boyfriend".

Around 1230 or so,all of us were wondering "Where the !@#$ is our president?" I think he sat outside the club until 2 something.Lol!!Oh ya i forgot,Sean Hooi is our new president for Bachelors Union and guess who is the vice? >"< class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">mamak after that,me and Adeline came slightly later than the rest,only to find that well,the man who lost his smile and man who can't be moved.
And the others ..

Adeline and Clement.erm no,Clement wasn't drunk at all.

So we're at Hhl's place and we arranged where and who to sleep with.I ended up sleeping with Becks,Clement with Hhl,Leon and Ah Soon living room and Sean get to sleep with himself.Not more than 10 minutes,everyone was asleep.I was trying my hardest to ignore my stomach and fall asleep.I ended up vomiting,and what surprised me most was that none of them bother to see what's going on in the toilet : (
And i told myself , "ok now,should be able to fall asleep very soon".I barely slept and clement started to take pics of people sleeping and it was around 9am.I heard him coming into the room,i was just too weak to say anything or to put in any effort to avoid myself from the camera.

Another reason why i can't sleep.

i dont know why.Dont ask me.He didnt mean to sleep that way.He just need to remind himself of something. : )

Leon's legs were always close to Ah Soon's face.

Hhl.He woke up at 7,came back slept again.

After half an hour of chatting between me and Clement in the living room,well those two finally woke up.

Leon and Ah Soon been in denial(Ah Soon replied 2 sms and Leon rolled couple of times),knowing well that they were awake,they still blamed Clement and me for talking too loud.Ah Soon suggested that we should have went outside and chat all we want.

it's good to wake up and do some work out.and yes i know my hair is terrible,going to cut it soon.

i'll just leave it that way.

still in denial.

This pic is my personal favorite.Sean and Ah Soon is in love with each other,Becks looked jealous that he was supposed to be with Sean,I was asking myself when is it my turn to fall deep in love and Leon,he was once love drunk,he's now hung over : )

So after we grabbed our breakfast(obviously Hhl didn't),we started our journey for paintball painball watever u call it la.

We actually divided the group into 2.Group A and B.Yet to start,but we already drew a line.

Team A

Team B including clement who was behind the camera

Notice that how imbalanced was the teams? Team A,i can say at least 4 of them were once considered as heroes of counter strike.Team B, is as i quote myself "We are a bunch of weaklings".

Us.

We have to sign those before we play.Sorta like if you're injured,they will not be liable to anything.

i'm sure everyone got the idea when they saw the field name.

most importing thing in the world.Face mask.Even the muscular Sean agreed

if i'm not mistaken;Hui Zhen,Adeline,Leon,Hhl,Sean,Becks,Ah soon and me.
Leon with the "game on" look.
Ment was telling us to watch our backs.

putting on our vest.Most of them thinks that the vest didnt provide much sense of security

us with the vest and face mask.

While waiting for the briefing,it was tensed and Adeline just can't take it anymore.We paid attention to the instructor Roy more than we did to our lecturers. :P

erm maybe chung han didn't.

At one point Roy said that if there's someone held their arm up signalling that they're out,we shouldnt shoot that person anymore.Well we have different ideas if the person is Ah Soon

Face mask on.Time to war.

After this picture,decades worth of friendship were put aside,seriously.

Team A,the team that was once feared by many (team B), on check mode.

Roy: "Ready,go go go!"

notice the guy on the right,Hhl?He's one of the sharp shooter.

even Roy knew who was the star of the game.

After the first round,Team B won.Underdog pulled an upset over the favourites.

discussing on how to overturn the dominance of Team B

team B was concerned with my rib.Lol.

Friendship?What is friendship?
Hui Zhen was waiting her turn to get the gun and I was determined not to be shot at.

Team B on check mode.

Clement.at the far side,Sean.

I think it was here that my teammates, Sean and Soo Wai got Hhl surrounded.Hhl won.

All eyes on Hhl again.

The sign told the story,it was funny Hui Zhen's injuries were concentrated at her wrist. XD

I cant remember which round was this and i cant remember who won.But judging by the injuries,i guess Team B won again.

Chee Tat : "Showing injuries or posing for hand muscles oo?!"

"They call me emo god?I was smiling for two pics in the row now"

Let's just ignore this pic. : )

Head shot?

perhaps you already know the rambo of Team B,Clement and Sean.

I was waiting for the right moment to shoot and Kok Wai was hiding.

She might look cute to you,but i think she's more than capable to shoot your head off your shoulder

Full grown man with muscles running and screaming for help XD

This was where hhl was shooting at Hui Zhen and me.It was a perfect angle for him.CB!

It was over after one hour plus or two maybe.The final score was (*drums*) ..Team A 2 - Team B 3.For pictures below,you just need to say ouch,that go

this is why Clement told us to watch our backs :P
yeah,the neck.

Thanks for the memories people :P And now we had officially bid farewell to Becks.Ok this took away alot of hours from me.Time for afternoon nap.Nite. :P

"Hi,my name is Bruno" he says.

2009-08-18T13:17:00.004+08:00

Classes canceled.It's good because i need not to wake myself up at 6ish in the morning.To hell those 8am classes.But yet without classes,i'm bored.Nothing to "cuci mata" they say.I most probably walk all the way to tapao mcd anyway,so hopefully i'll run into some japanese or korean girls.I wonder how come they're much hotter than local girls.Hmm.. : )
Meet the little devil in my place,Bruno the dog.Cute as hell only when he's sleeping.

I would like to take this opportunity to make a shoutout to Mr Teh aka Becks,since he's leaving for uk soon.Let's all be sad,erm at least pretend if you're not.

Becks drinking green shit.

I forgot what was this called either.Let's name it orange shit.

My effort to be a good son.But in the end,i ate most of them.

Thank you Becks for lending your ears all these while,especially this year.I know it's rough for both of us so far this year,maybe this brought us that much closer.I promise to try my very best to attend your farewell party.I missed too many parties especially the ones that matters according to some of my friends.Not forgetting you,the one who wish upon the star and has a special fetish for the rainbow,you are leaving to uk too.My bet is on you wont be reading this anyway,but i would like to bid farewell and wish you luck as well.A part of me wish u somehow get to read this as things aren't the same anymore.I can't call or text whenever i want,as i told myself not to.So this is the way i say goodbye to you.I wonder if there's an alternative way to do so.

Stomach making weird noises,time to go.

with regards,Chee Tat.

2009-08-15T00:56:00.002+08:00

New layout for my blog.It looks less gloomy,does it not?Blue is my favourite colour.I couldn't resist!And i think i fixed the time as well.All these considered as an update. =) Till next time.

sincerely,Chee Tat.

Not for a child to read. : )

2009-08-10T23:34:00.000+08:00

It's been awhile.I wonder if anyone misses me during this "break".Let's not be hopeful as life teaches us not to.Yes, i did promise not to post anything close to pessimistic. But hey,it's not easy to get rid of a habit eh?So what have i learned so far?For instance,promises are not meant to keep,at least one is not obliged to keep their promises.Promises is what they say in early phase of failure-in-making process.As i remembered going through the pages of the "Secret",i recalled one of the ideas,mainly about being optimistic.Hmm it goes something like this, "If you believe that you can do something,one day somehow someway you will be able to".Well this sentence gave me the impression of if i think that i can ,then i can.A joke indeed if you ask me.You can ask anyone,and they'll tell you otherwise.Once in a blue moon,with a lady luck smiled upon him/her, he or she is one of those that "if i believe i can,i can".Let's be honest to each other shall we?We do tend to hope for alot of things.Which beggar on the road dare not to dream,hope or wish to be something else than they are right now? Is that those childhood stories that we're brought up with,Cinderella,Beauty and the Beast,Snow White and the 7 Dwarves or maybe even those movies we enjoyed watching while growing up.They mislead us that good will always win the evil and happily ever after(dont even get me start on this).If you've a 9 year old cousin who's reading with you,please close their eyes for the next sentence.No,i dont believe in Christmas miracles either.Nothing against it though.OH YEAH,santa isn't real too kid.

Speaking of childhood stories,Rapunzel anyone?The one with long hair and with the magic sentence,the hair will come down and serves like a ladder/stair?Maybe this might help, "Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your hair, so that I may climb the golden stair." If you remember,cause i don't,there was a prince overheard her singing and came to her?I personally thinks if it's not a prince,she wouldnt bother throwing her hair down even if he screamed the magic sentence until his lungs collapsed.Or if the tears of Rapunzel healed the prince's eyes and only for him to find out that Rapunzel is all old and weak,do you think he would still give a damn?There goes the affection.Happily ever after?I doubt so.There goes another little girl or boy's hope in impersonating fairy tale like story.Well I say,boys,go for short hairs.Girls,well suck it up.There will never be any prince for you people,even there is,what makes you think they will go after you rather than those princesses? :)

One mistake will really screw you up,no matter how hard you tried to fix it.You thought,oh well he/she'll eventually get over it as long that u sincerely apologized and constant bugging that person.Hmm actually they don't.They'll still remember every inch,centimeters and millimeters of that one mistake,regardless of the size.100 good deeds you done,so what?It could be jeopardize with just one sin.Well i might be using the wrong example,who cares?It's my blog.So shutup.Now where was i?Thanks for interrupting.Now i forgot where was i heading to with this hmmm mistake part.Dammit.And i was trying to break record with my post.Actually i did once,a long long long post.Well it was almost a year ago.It was back then.No use looking into the past.Yeah this we must not forget.Ahh look at the time.Time to sleep.Dont bother about my blog's time.It's inaccurate i guess.Sigh how fucked up is this,cant even get the time right in here.Pathetic indeed.

Karma still biting and it doesnt wanna let go.

2009-08-01T23:47:00.000+08:00

Due to some unforeseen circumstances,this blog shall be temporarily inactive till further notice.If i were having one follower or two,hmm too bad la.I got no intention to flood this blog with fucking pathetic emo posts.And i do think that i showed enough pathetic side of me,it's only 1st day of august,and i've already lost track of those type of posts.Till i finally sort things out,this remain inactive as a obese american. ( :

One thing i can assure you,this is far from over.So save your kiss goodbye.

ps:yes i stole most of the part of the sentence from a song's lyric.So what?sue me bitch.Oh yeah if you must know,i went to Rakuzen for dinner again.And yes,i'm sick of that place.

so gonna get killed.

2009-08-01T01:36:00.000+08:00

He again having doubts. "All these,is it worthwhile?Well,God wont overlook efforts right?God shall reward those who put efforts?How do i know if my efforts are enough to be earning a reward?" Once awhile he convinced himself that "life is not about getting results,it's the joy in getting there.But what if i try,i try and i try,but yet i dont see results.Do i qualify to at least whine a little?Can i at least say i'm starting to get tired of trying?"

He then ask his friend.

he :"Hey, Zan.Do you believe that efforts will be rewarded somehow?sooner or later?"
zan :Of cuz will be rewarded.
he :Says who?How sure are you?
zan :dont know.however,you'll be rewarded.If you do fail,learn from mistake,that can be consider as reward as well.
he : Well,so far i'm sorta like a living testimonial of efforts-bring-you-nowhere
zan:Maybe it is just not your time to receive the reward yet
he :Is it that my efforts arent enough?
zan:Maybe,work harder is the only way.
he :Fine,maybe you're right about efforts.What about having patience?
zan :What about it?
he :You waited,you waited and you waited.Nothing comes up,but then you thought finally something showed up,what a disappointment.
zan:Continue waiting,your time will come.
he :I've waited,just to witness a disappointment
zan: witnessed,then move along.
he :What if tomorrow requires you to wait yet again?
zan:*annoyed* You idiot,dont wait then!It's pointless,there's only disappointment.Better things lie ahead.
he :Let's say it's a mountain.I would like to reach the top,and see what view beholds.
zan:You're an idiot.Continue waiting then.If it was me,i won't.I feel that i deserve better.
he :I still stick to my opinion.
zan :Go die climbing.
he : :(

how could i,if you dont let me.

2009-07-28T13:22:00.000+08:00

faith

Confident belief in the truth, value, or trustworthiness of a person, idea, or thing.
Belief that does not rest on logical proof or material evidence.
Loyalty to a person or thing; allegiance: keeping faith with one's supporters.
often Faith Christianity The theological virtue defined as secure belief in God and a trusting acceptance of God's will.
The body of dogma of a religion: the Muslim faith.
A set of principles or beliefs.

hope

To wish for something with expectation of its fulfillment.
Archaic To have confidence; trust.

To look forward to with confidence or expectation: We hope that our children will be successful.
To expect and desire.

A wish or desire accompanied by confident expectation of its fulfillment.
Something that is hoped for or desired: Success is our hope.
One that is a source of or reason for hope: the team's only hope for victory.
often Hope Christianity The theological virtue defined as the desire and search for a future good, difficult but not impossible to attain with God's help.
Archaic Trust; confidence.

be⋅lieve

1.	to have confidence in the truth, the existence, or the reliability of something, although without absolute proof that one is right in doing so: Only if one believes in something can one act purposefully.

2.	to have confidence or faith in the truth of (a positive assertion, story, etc.); give credence to.

3.	to have confidence in the assertions of (a person).

4.	to have a conviction that (a person or thing) is, has been, or will be engaged in a given action or involved in a given situation: The fugitive is believed to be headed for the Mexican border.

5.	to suppose or assume; understand (usually fol. by a noun clause): I believe that he has left town.

believe in,

a.	to be persuaded of the truth or existence of: to believe in Zoroastrianism; to believe in ghosts.

b.	to have faith in the reliability, honesty, benevolence, etc., of: I can help only if you believe in me.

2009-07-27T20:33:00.000+08:00

Taking hold, breaking in
The pressures on, need to circulate
Memorized and taken in
Take it slow, so it resonates
It's time to rest, not to sleep away
My thoughts alone, try to complicate
I'll do my best, to seek you out
And be myself and not impersonate

Chorus:
I tried so hard to not walk away
And when things don't go my way
I still carry on and on just the same
I've always been strong
i cant make this happen
'Cause I need to breathe
I want to breathe you in
The fear of becoming,
I'm so tired of running
'Cause I need to breathe

I want to breathe you in
I want to breathe you in

I'm going in, so cover me
Your compass will, help me turn the page
The laughing stalk, I'll never be
Because I wont let them take me

[Chorus]

Took awhile to see, all the love that's around me
Through the highs and lows, there's' that truth that I know
And it's you

Yeahh, and I
I've always been strong
But cant make this happen
'Cause I need to breathe
I want to breathe you in
The fear of becoming
I'm so tired of runnin
'Cause I need to breathe
I want to breathe you in[x4]
I want to, I want to
I want to breathe you in[x2]
I want to breathe
I want to, I want to
I want to breathe(I want to, I want to)
I want to breathe you in[x2]
I want to breathe

2009-07-27T00:25:00.000+08:00

Song : Beautiful Letdown
By : Switchfoot

It was a beautiful letdown
When I crashed and burned
When I found myself alone
Unknown and hurt
It was a beautiful letdown
The day I knew
That all the riches this world had to offer me
Would never do

In a world full of bitter pain
And bitter doubts
I was trying so hard to fit in
Fit in, until I found out

I don't belong here (I don't belong)
I don't belong here (I don't belong)
I will carry a cross and a song
Where I don't belong
I don't belong

It was a beautiful letdown
When You found me here
Yeah, for once in a rare blue moon
I see everything clear
I'll be a beautiful letdown
That's what I'll forever be
And though it may cost my soul
I'll sing for free

We're still chasing our tails
In the rising sun
In our dark water planet still spinning
In a direction no one wins
No one's won.

See, I don't belong here (I don't belong)
Well, I don't belong here, I don't belong
I will carry a cross
With a song where I don't belong
I don't belong
I don't belong here (I don't belong)
No, I don't belong here, I don't belong
I'm gonna set side
And set sail
For the kingdom come, kingdom come
Your kingdom come
Won't you let me down, yeah
Let my foolish pride forever let me down

Ah, Easy living, you're not much like the name
Easy dying, you look just about the same
Would you please take me off your list
Easy living please c'mon and let me down

We are a beautiful letdown
Painfully uncool
The church of the dropouts
The losers, the sinners, the failures, and the fools
What a beautiful letdown
Are we salt in the wound
Hey, let us sing one true tune

I don't belong here (I don't belong)
It feels like I don't belong here, yeah
It goes like I don't belong here
I don't belong (I don't belong)
Won't you let me down (I don't belong)
C'mon and let me down (I don't belong)
You always let me down (I don't belong)
So glad that I'm let down (I don't belong)
C'mon and let me down (I don't belong)
'Cause I don't belong here
Won't you let me down!

A night that he stared at perfection.

2009-07-26T21:18:00.000+08:00

It was drizzling that night."Well I hope it doesn't get worse later.I got plans,please!" he told himself as he was on his way to pick up his friend for a drink. He and his friend talked about scandals among their batch,yeah time flew.Without realizing clock now shows 1130, he was late for his plans.He tried to recall the directions that his friend gave in order to reach the destination for the night.He drove there as fast as possible but yet maintain at a safe speed.So as he hesitated each turnings he made,and finally he reached the house.It matches the description that his friend gave earlier on."Come on,pick up the phone!" But yet no one answered the phone.Not long after he heard the familiar ringtone,he answered and heard the all needed information. "Go down now,you're good to go." He quickly went down,ignoring the drizzling rain and stood at the front gate.Approaching were two,one a lady-like and one was awkwardly standing there right beside,opening the door. "hmm,should i yell hi auntie?what if she was her sister?" *gulp*

As she walks her way towards him and finally stopped at a respectful distance in between both of them.

"Come on now,say something.SAY SOMETHING!!!ANYTHING!!"

*moment of what people usually describe as butterfly in his stomach*

"Err hi,happy birthday" he said,handing the box to the girl and noticed that the lady still staring at him.Even a blind man can tell that he was very nervous and shy.And a couple of sentences afterwards he ended the conversation and slowly walked away.The staring from the lady was too much for him.

i shall continue this story next time.lack of inspiration. ;)

2009-07-20T22:35:00.000+08:00

and i thought i found my new addiction.If there were 3,count them 2 now.I cant and i wont understand.I actually kept a tiny place for hope, faith or watever u call it these days despite agreeing with Leon that this world is a rotten place.

In the end,hope indeed is just a hoax,so forget everything you've heard.

Hmm..maybe not.

2009-07-18T23:40:00.000+08:00

Lunch @ Solaris Mont Kiara.During lunch hour,they have this special offer for lunch sets. Cheaper : ) . I really wanted to you the prices of the food but then if i snap more pics,it's gay.

When i was leaving Boston,there's bunch of ppl downstairs filiming a movie or music video.I see no chinese,so i assume it's a malay movie. ( :
2 days or 3 days earlier,the news came out about a 22 year old passed away due to a fire in his unit right?This the place,which is very near to Solaris.In case you were wondering,no i couldnt have noticed,it was quite far away from my condo.Well it's kinda obviously that black stained in the pic.According to my sis,the condo beside that Bayu could see the whole process.omg -.- So i'm glad that my sis's unit is on 1st floor,jumping down wouldnt be a problem.

Dinner came early today,we went back to Solaris for korean food.Well,those guys ain't done with the filming yet.The pic couldnt see that clearly : ( but then i can confirm you guys that it's a malay movie.If see any wkx 9008 in a malay movie,that's me in the car. Lol.

Satisfying my hunger with korean food,it's one of the best way to do so.

I gotta feeling,that tonight's gonna be a good night,
that tonight's gonna be a good night
that tonight's gonna be a good,good night.

Hmm..maybe not.

2009-07-18T02:03:00.000+08:00

Saja want let my friends see how's my hair now.yes it's growing and growing by each day.Soon i'll be just another emo freak yet again.

sorry for the sleepy look,it was 630 in the morning.

And i went to this place for dinner.

Leon and I had a talk.Ya man,occasionally Leon and I will have some emo talks of our own.Don't jealous cuz i got a friend to emo with.Constant reality checks,reminding ourselves of how this world is full of unjust.

I found my new addiction. ( :

Ethan - Blog

October ended.

Different point of view.

a very much #BU weekend *updated*

a very much #BU weekend

day # 61

Quickie

Best weekend of my life so far

ouch!

A walk to remember

Confession on the Incubus weekend

abit upset.

cleaning up my closet

random

man on the run.

You.

When two become one.

Never had a dream come true

Update of me.

Funny.

Mixture feelings

#6 and the last.

#5

#4 day starts like this

Story that almost didn't make it in mainstream. *edited*

Memories of nobody

One at a time.

A helping hand and a light.

Every ending,there's a new beginning.

the revival.. sort of.

mistakes.

*smeethan

Hello!

consider this locked.

They say there's no what if in love.interesting.

i just cant sing -____-"

Rock Scissors Paper

the week that i dont get to sleep more than 6 hours.

Cactus i shall burn them all

thank you.

How to annoy faithful readers?

October 10th

Seriously,i can't read minds.

Day two edited*

Day one. *edited*

Bachelor's Union Saturday Gone Wild. *updated*

"Hi,my name is Bruno" he says.

Not for a child to read. : )

Karma still biting and it doesnt wanna let go.

so gonna get killed.

how could i,if you dont let me.

be⋅lieve

A night that he stared at perfection.

Hmm..maybe not.

a very much #BU weekend updated

Story that almost didn't make it in mainstream. edited

Day one. edited

Bachelor's Union Saturday Gone Wild. updated